Friday, December 31, 2010






























































Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

the long night

draws to a close

as the light increases

one cannot imagine the day

but has a pretty good


this slow dawn


the imminent morning

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the great fall

is over

we've landed on

our feet

(just barely)

and take a

moment to pray

for those who landed

on their heads

before we proceed

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the eastern sky

lightens imperceptibly--

tired before

a cold screen

my entire life

alive in my brain--

I sit still

this instant my entire content--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
morning star Venus

shining in the window

the waning crescent

next to it--

this conjunction


the hardest year

at the world's worst time--

at least for those who do not believe the signs

nor have any faith in what they do believe--

the rest of us look forward

to what is to come

blessed by Venus

before this dawn---

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
my intent is not

to affirm your agendas

or support your insanity--

nor do I hope

to hope for a better

day and an imaginary

brother- and sisterhood

of like minded

disciples swayed and comforted

by vatic flatulence--

no--my intent

is simply to stare

out the window

at the last quarter moon

hanging over mountains of snow

on this dark morning

after a day of rage

that undermines all desire

I have to repent and transcend

(still longing to escape the confines

of the world at my age!)

and share with you

a view of utter defeat

that is

the purest victory

a solitary soul can achieve--

true communion

with those like me

who never tire of waiting

to hear the Voice to say

what we wish to hear--

thus is my intent

thus I need to start

yet again again

Content 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

I'm out of strategies

and that's a good thing--

like a surfer rides the wave

I'll glide in the vectors of grace

that guide us through our trials--

happy at last for half a chance

to assume my own blame

or to celebrate my own triumph

Content 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
can we come out from under cover?

is it safe to resume?

if I knew the answers

I'd still doubt myself

but not the emergency

that got me moving--

oh let me know if you can do better

and I'll follow you

but not as far as to follow you

over the cliff edge

I avoided while looking for you

can we come out from under cover?

is it safe to resume?

I don't know the answers and neither do you--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010


I wouldn't trust myself

to be calm in a crisis

but I do rise to the occasion

and I have saved the day--

no wonder my friends have made me

an honorary Jew--

I too thrive on aggravation--


let it be known now--

the only difference I've seen

between Jews and Italians

is tomato sauce


my friends know I'm nuts

but my friends know I'm true

I'm the stand-up guy

who gets mowed down

by the materialist maniacs

who'd destroy the world

for a toy--or a lay that they could own--


I am various persons

to various people--

no--not a fake--

but embracing the multiplicity

of all we are


I live under unspeakable circumstances--

and God finds this acceptable


I like my solitude--

but I don't mind sharing

a lifeboat


good God--

all the grief You put us through--

You with your 'every whit of the price be paid'

while those good souls you harass

take their privations

as matter of course

and accept it--

would Lord You be as kind and forgiving

as we are to each other--


a New Age coming?

it's already here

wreck and historically ruin

while we just take it

as 'oh here's another conqueror

who thinks he's going to command corpses!'


love is all there is

love is all that's left

let us not lose sight of it

in the losses of our illusions


no need to say

see you down the line

we're on our way

hell we're already there

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Monday, December 27, 2010

always the step too far--

but always the least time to get home--

some times you must run

by your own clock

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the best way to be happy

is to desire nothing--

(there! try explaining that

to those who think classic nobility

is negativity!)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
how happy the one who can turn away

and not be judged ill by God and Man--

some call him Christ

others the Buddha--

how happy that One who can

in turning away

be turning toward--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
as the rain waters the soil

so the tear cleanses the soul

do not doubt the world

it works as it does because

it works as it does

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito
why complain that nothing makes sense anymore?

nothing ever made sense--

but at least we were strong and young enough

to take it as a dare and challenge the world--

now we know better

and those young'uns you're jealous of

will one day also know better

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I must have been out for a dozen years--

I came out of my dream

and the nieces and nephews I remembered

as toddlers were grown

into beautiful young women and handsome men--

and I felt the vertigo of spiraling years

as a torch was handed off

and I watched its blur dissolve into the only vision--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I'm drawing away
into the wind

--nah--jus' tawkin' shit ag'in

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito
I am must grateful

for (so far) surviving

the awful year of 2010--

for lasting through


and money-sucking illnesses

to find myself broke

and making doctors and insurance companies

rich rich rich

(doing my share to revive the economy

he said sarcastically)--

through deaths in the family

that made me realize why

I stayed out of touch for so many years

and why I was glad to bury the hatchet

and come back in from the cold

(it was never easy--never what I wanted--

never what they wanted--and still

making the best of what we have)

the comfort of easy moments

makes it easy to stand on an imaginary

mountaintop and preach to the deaf--

shine a light to the blind--

and see my own vanity reflected back

until the lesson of silence I always treasured

finally took hold--and for the coming year

let whatever prophecies fill our frightened ears

with their own ignorance--

I am most grateful to have awakened

to the fact of the eternal instant

in which all our notions of God Goddess Big Bang

fleeting time and attempts to live outside

the social illusions we call community

swirl in one anguished awareness

that (may it be so) will deliver us

to our desolation--

our exit --our release

to gratitude

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

existential dread

or religious pep talk--

how much of life

actually played out

in real time

we miss

because we can do nothing

better than dream

and inhabit that dream--

see you in the morning

when we awakening to our next move...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I don't know what the rest of the way will be like--

but if it's anything like I've heretofore seen

I''l yank my eyelids wider

and step it up for sure--the sooner I get where I'm going

the better--shit on that "it's the journey that matters" stuff--

may we weary ones be spared the platitudes of everyone's agendas!

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
what exactly will those who'll say they miss when I'm gone

miss about me? I'm sorry I cannot find this out while I inhabit

this skin--instead of wasting the first few moments of bodily release--

that joyous break of the silver cord--on hovering

in some corner of the ceiling spying on my mourners

to find out something I might've already known--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the form of woman

is the personification of the infinite--

let fools denounce this tribute

from this form at the opposite pole--

use rational arguments and other illusions

to prop their idiot theories (these half-wits

who know truth like the blind know light--)

the form of woman

will always take me into the very heart of creation

and leave me screwed over there in mindless joy...*

* This is something we all know; for gays and lesbians, substitute "masculine/feminine" for gender-specific physiological classifications; it's the "yin/yang" energies that determine these
attractions. And while this seems obvious to many of us, the word must be given again and again, as generation after generation is full of souls who "didn't get the memo."

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

the hatreds we endure

are our own hurts

coming back to us

from those we've hurt

to those from whom we've received harm

(all the same and coming on cue

though it be woe onto them)

mockery is out!!!

we've done our time as snickering jackass hipsters

(hipsters! the fake bohemians! the pretenders mooching off

the patron's table while the genuine artist suffers

all kinds of madness and grief and who is mocked

by every ignoramus including (most especially the-- YES!--

hipster!) time for something new in our lives--


we all stumble down the same pass

so it's not wise to judge

unless you love the hatreds you endure--in which case--

by your own call--you're on your own

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

oh what the hell is your problem now?

sure you never catch a break

you're always yammering about how you never catch a break--

do you really expect someone to pitch one to you?

I suggest you give up your high-handed pride

(which everyone knows is bad disguise for fear and regret)

and join us down here at the celebration--

so low we sit on the floor and feel hell burns our asses but

so high we can poke a finger into a cloud and spy on heavenly fields--

I mean give us a break and take your own chances with life--

you'll certainly be a lot happier...

see? there's the opportunity you've been waiting for...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I long for life beyond life...

and yet here I am

still here on earth

still in a decaying body

that aches for its prime

even when it squandered its prime on

longing for life beyond life...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Friday, December 24, 2010











































































































Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the beast takes a break

the angels corral him for the night

let no one disturb this hindering ritual

when heaven manifests on earth

(even if for the fleeting 'eternal' second)

its power is strong enough to fortify us

against all the hell to pay we'll endure

for having it in our experience...

mercy mercy True One

just a little mercy...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
give season's greetings if you must

but know the holy is always here and now

no less or more in our sorriest sin and remorse

than in our finest 'good feelings' about ourselves

all these religions and all these different names

for the Unnameable while the Ineffable One

in all patience and steadiness of love waits

for us to acknowledge the Presence cleansed of symbols

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.






Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I cannot weep

and cannot sleep

and all I reap

I cannot keep

but the cliff is steep

to its edge I'll creep

for I am allowed to take a leap

and be gathered in a heap

fall on my head and go beep

while out my ears my brains seep

(--enough of this nonsense--

time to toast the boys out of trenches

by Xmas 2394)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
2010 was so horrible--

I'll not only be happy to see it go

but may even risk brain damage

in some spectacular way

to blot it out of my conscious memory--

I know some apocalypse is at hand

and the One must first clean house--

but really--why not destroy the world outright

to save it?

oh--that is the plan?!

oh--oh--do I feel faint--

trying to be holy yes--

but being ready to be a saint?*

[*moron's glossolalia]

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the fellowship is bleeding

one more left behind

but trust that "da Lawd"

will gather the kneeling and the signed

in one tremendous gust

to bear away the afflicted

who've renounced bodily delight

for keeping their souls restricted

the fellowship is bleeding

but it's the wine that cleanses

so in one wide slug and mouth wipe

lift the cup for forgiveness

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.








Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

the apocalypse of each and every day

is its own quiet secret

in the heart of each and every one of us--

creation swirls all around us

in the earth and on every other dimension

and all we can see is a vortex of chaos--

but is it chaos--or just manifestations

of an order so vast and incomprehensible

we can only stand there slack-jawed before

its precision?

does it really matter to know?

the processes grind out

without mercy or pity--

but what mercy or pity there is

is in us--

and that--is today's apocalypse--

today's revelation

leading to tomorrow's

and the next day's--

door after door

opening to the Ineffable

at last--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
biting cold this winter morning--

a gray slab of cloud

over a saffron southern horizon--

how many mornings in the world

like this one has gladdened my heart...

has shown me the Light

undermining every darkness?

hope has been replaced by certainty--

and I head for that Light--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I wish I could show you

how much fun I have--

but people think I'm nuts

because I love peace and quiet

and they're about disturbing my peace

because they cannot comprehend--

for God's sake children--I'm not from Mars--

I was born here (against my will or not

while they live in their skins in the earth--)

and I'll die here and frankly

as long as all I love lasts with me

the hardships can (and will be) left in a heap

for which others may account--

for myself and mine (whoever they really are)

let's uncork another bottle (none for me thanks)

and love in this eternal moment

both never to be again and always to be--

you figure for yourself--

I'm happy enough right now--and that's

more than enough--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I don't need a clamoring bunch of

nabobs (O Spiro you dawg)

to guide me to the latest manifestations

of societal madness--

it's enough for me to stare out a window

with my own head vibrating

to some unheard-0f frequency

only wild prophets from the desert

have dared to address--

(O Isaiah! O Jeremiah! am I in your company

or just another pretender to the burial mound?)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
hey bozo boy--

what scam do we pull today?

what shuck do we jive

to convince ourselves and others

we exist?

or--will we awaken to a new personal reality

when karma won't pull the rug out from under us

every time we try to amend our ways?

you don't know bozo boy

and neither do I--

though (fatally perhaps)

I have an inkling--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

there--you achieved what you

set out to achieve

and even with its validity and value affirmed

you still feel unsatisfied--

it must be rough to work a lifetime

and still think you got it wrong--

did you fail God or merely your own expectations?

even the Almighty cannot help you with that

if you don't know what or where or when or how

or why...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
here's that man again--

I survived the eclipse

waiting for its ramifications to reveal themselves--

bitch bitch bitch

gripe gripe gripe--

and the world continues regardless--



all of it false

in the face of actually

loving the One with one's whole heart and soul

and your neighbor as yourself-

petition "da Lawd" all you wish

but the Law is inexorable

and the mercy weak for those

who know it not--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Monday, December 20, 2010

I believe I will not believe what you choose to believe

or would demand that I believe

but I don't believe I can believe every thing I believe you said

but you said you did believe me so now I can believe anything I wish

to believe which I believe I cannot believe any longer because now

no one else believes me nor do I believe them any more than

I can believe myself

(and no--at least I won't say "can you believe it"

I believe you should disregard that)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

do you believe me when I say

I wouldn't have it any other way?

you and I together to last

just in time as time glides passed?

we've seen too much to let it go

and though I fail you this I know

I tally the sins for which I pay

and would have it no other way-

(for A--)

(now don't be goin' "awwwwww" now!)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
some people say I live in the past--

not so--not so at all--

it's just that the past

is still present for being ever in my

consciousness--it will never be gone--

how could it if indeed time and space are always

perpetually here and now?

my parents and grandparents stand beside me

(and who they were in previous lives standing beside

who I was in previous lives)

And foes and friends and 'frenemies' and 'froes' alike (O

William and Mammi--my good boys--my tuxedo buddies--

ever missed--and go ahead and mock--I'm

no hypocrite--but do long for their familiar forms

as long as I'm in this one and they are

worth infinitely more than far too many humans--

and may St. Francis intercede if God wishes to damn me

for saying this!--) all of them--all of us here--

and you and me--lifetimes over and over--

forgive me my small little moment of melancholy--

it's hard to realize eternity--with the ignorant

clamoring in my ears about the past--

which has come to pass just...right...NOW!--

there it goes--past--and here we are--now--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito

anyone who lives long enough

becomes a surrealist---

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I used to believe

that leaves fell like great flock of sparrows

fluttering down to seeds and bread crumbs

some on the upper branches keeping watch for

the pigeons and others pecking and flying

away in a gust--

now I just believe

leaves fall

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I used to think

Nirvana was in the mind

and now I know

it is--

(I apologize to all the


for this corny Aquarian Age

version of a Borscht Belt joke)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
hanged man be damned--

I've plenty of mornings to my credit

where I've looked up

and seen the ground--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
it occurs to me that even illusion is real--

it's actually there fogging up the mind

obscuring the Way with a heavy mist

like damp gauze--

not so easy to distinguish--

whether you're sure it is

or not so sure it isn't--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the future opens before me--

all possibilities bloom--

but like lilies planted on the mound

of all the grave dirt of former hopes--

getting real is as much an illusion

as any other earth-bound notion--

absolute reality is as right and true

as our hopes are wrong and false--

and so the ultimate test of trust--

walking the talk and silencing talk--

some of us succeed and some of us fail

but all of us move on--

each of us with the right absolution of prayer and faith

or with enough rope...

as we would have it

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
to those I love--

forgive me if I've done you wrong--

that was not the intent

though intent hardly seems

adequate excuse

in all the wreck of all the things

we hoped to embody--

may even forgiveness not be totally gone--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
My love is such

I cannot breathe--

I strive for what

is beyond me--

thank the One I found

my one

even if I am a hardship for her

for my pitiful purity's sake

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
tell the truth

and you'll suffer

live a lie

and be rewarded--

what do you want

on your headstone?

(I personally want

"Ain't this the shit?"

on mine...)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
a lunar eclipse happens today

and to hear the astrology mavens tell it

it's a game changer--

well, maybe...but

even when the Star Of Bethlehem shone brightly

over the manger

ordinary folk still went about

their common business--

oh indeed what rough beast slouches

toward the historic trough

for a swig? of what? Living Water?

Or mere blood?

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

well what unholy notion of god

are we attacking today?

who will we draw and quarter

because we are afraid of the dark?

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
liberals are into appeasement

conservatives are into being appeased

shouldn't we re-think

our affiliations?

--signed, "I who didn't even get

a lump of coal in my stocking"

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Friday, December 17, 2010

so much I'll miss

when I'm no longer here--

so much of it

gone in

the instant of its happening--

and all of it

part of my being

just from it

happening to me--

so if this is so

then I do possess it all

and all this melancholy's

merely a delusion of perspective

and a forgetting

of reality--

so it will be

when I awaken from this life

these sad confusions

will at last be


I'll not much miss--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

softly the years fade--

looking out

on some poorly-lit

street any cold winter midnight

from this dark window--

I see my whole life--

not by living in the past

but because that is the true full range

of my consciousness--

no past or future

just the always now

of all I am

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
before I make

pronouncement yet again

let me assure you

I'm not mad--

angry and predisposed

to see some assholes

finally get what's coming to them!!!!!--

but not mad--see?

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

go ahead

invent yourself



while I

how to squander

my 10%--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
don't ever kid yourself--

no one really misses you

when you go

except as a convenient character

your fans will spin

that you'd never recognize


Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

you wanted me to help you

after you've shot me down again?--

how impenetrable

the bubble

that surrounds you--

I envy you

your glamourous delusion--

fools and scoundrels indeed need

their guardian angels

working overtime--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
now what have you done--

I run out of things to say

to those who won't hear anyway--

and all you can do is laud me?

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

how sad to realize

a certain meeting might be

the last time you ever see someone

in this life--

after the last handshake

and long gaze

based on a recognition

of years and years

of good and bad memories--

that sad lone feeling

of a way closing behind you

once and for all

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

I cannot believe

I've lived this long

or made it

this far--

and though this

sojourn can

end at any


I can

comfort myself


all was not

in vain

despite whatever

wounded pride

learned to accept

what it considered


the only failure

was of false


so with yet another

clean slate and all the time

in the world until that

time runs out

let's proceed--

I'm glad to see

this awful year go--

and we'll talk more

next year--

at least those of us

still here--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I gave stones

to the hungry

lifetimes ago

and now

break my own

teeth these

lifetimes after--


is forgotten--


is forgiven--

I am



and am


but still--

it is hard


Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

fools come a cropper

and wise men profit

those who choose not to sow or reap

have other things that rob our sleep

and that's the goddamn topper

and nothing really for it

for even avoiding risk all the same

we wind up gaining nothing but the blame

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

old Holy Joe is gone--

he inhabited my heart

for the better part of my life

and now I've shown the asshole the door--

given him the boot--

shown him the way to Nirvana--Paradise--

standard pine box--generally speaking the Road--

Holy Joe can go bless himself with his vanity

and that spiritual pride that brings more harm into the world

than any number of devils in any multitudinous mob--

let him bamboozle the boobs and the bastards

while the rest of us kiss him off--knock back a few--and laugh

at all the foolishness of life that Holy Joe and his victims abhor

(the imbeciles) as we walk out in the brightening dawn

tired and peaceful--breathing the sweet air of Heaven--

the last stars fading...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito
red sky of a Monday morning--

I feel as if all the past were consumed

and there is nothing to which to go back--

there is only the present and the future--

red sky of a Monday morning--

the totality of all time and all space

over the darkened apartment buildings--

and here I am--and here we are--and this is it

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
what a blessed relief! no greater freedom

than not to care! let others ruin themselves with remorse!

if your brain is right and your heart is steady and sure

then by all means--you GO for your aspiration with no regrets!

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
let the proud vain mind drive itself to insanity--

the rest of us will 'tut tut' into our beers

then after feeling bad

have another drink and feel good around the hearth

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I would say more but for now I'll decline--

I've only room in my mouth for one foot at a time

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
he does not believe he is society's tool

anymore than he understands he plays the fool

when he distinguishes his mind from his heart

though neither knows each's place or part

this is why politicians and businessmen love him so

they play him fine and he'll never know

how truly he is society's tool

and how he will ever play the fool

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
karma may be inexorable

but I can't blame the Almighty's judgment totally

when I myself have screwed up so much

so effortlessly

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Once again among you

I have wailed and denounce and lamented--

now I must return--to repent--to confess--to atone--

hard as this transition will be--may it not be worse than what we've known previously--

life will continue one way or another and what is to come

will reflect what has been--but not to be repeated--nor reinstated--

I've been outcast too long--will I be forgiven my ingratitude?

will I finally forget the price of disloyalty to those who trusted me?

finally forget the sufferings and loneliness of my separation?

will I be taken back in, and go out no more?

our time in the earth is ending and the term is closing--

it's a long way to go if you don't know where you've been--

I await the final word of my liege--may I not doubt my own words

of confess--may I no longer abuse the grace that has protected me all along--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

9 more days until the Winter Solstice 2010--then

2 more years until the long awaited time of Apocalypse is upon us--

then we will see how it actually plays out in real time--

the we'll see what true revelation will be at hand

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito

Saturday, December 11, 2010

a prayer for those with too much to lose and not enough to gain--

for those who've had their faith disabused of mercy and salvation
because they didn't realize the selfish nature of their worship--

for those who disdain themselves by projecting their self-hatreds
on others--

for those too self-alienated to read reality in its actuality--

a prayer for those who despair of the impenetrable bubble that
surrounds each of us in our identities--

for those whose imperfect love makes them feel every jagged tear
in their hearts--

for those who find kindred souls and still find an impossible
separation between them--

for those who've finally stepped out the bounds of all earthly strictures
and bake in the desert day and freeze in the desert night--

for all who've reached the bottom of the world and with fading strength
struggle amid the husks and shells of previous creations
because of the blank spot in all consciousness that only the Ineffable
would fill--
the Ineffable that supports all worlds but the imaginary ones in each creature's
limited mind--

oh only One--for all who list toward the final all-consuming Void--a hope--a wish

a prayer--a prayer--a prayer...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010















(with thanks to Steve Brower for the typographical arrangement--from more moons ago than I think either of us would care to admit)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

well, no need to keep up the apocalyptic 'Jeremiah' tone--

the old world is gone

and the new world is here--

and as for me--this blog will continue in the mode of "done is done

and now we'll examine the day-by-day hells leading to what heaven"--

I do know that a 'New Age' will not automatically manifest

in mass behavior--this world will ever be an "Anti-Christ's" kingdom

and those who hold with that will die with it and be lost--

actuality reality is and always will be of the "I and Thou" variety--

it is in the actual pure contact we make with others

in that eternal instant of contact--of living--

may we all continue the conservation on the other side

of all this sad illusion--Love!--and put your spiritual money

where your mouth is--forgive me while I stop to swallow--

my mouth is full--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Friday, December 3, 2010

Have you ever felt that life was a cartoon--and you're Wile E. Coyote?

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito

Wednesday, December 1, 2010


Years ago, I thought of doing an article to be called "Where's David Blue?" It seemed that after twenty years dead, he was being forgotten, while other 60s singer/songwriters were being gathered into retrospective box sets and being reconsidered. Now, years later, Blue is slowly but surely making his way back to some degree of public consciousness.

But there is still a lingering problem that is as much Blue's fault as it is the lazy arrogance of our ever-ready-to-pontificate bar stool critics (for whom the Net has proven a godsend against people telling them to shut up and go home.) That problem is Blue's unshakable tag as a Dylan clone.

For David Blue had his own original voice and lyric style; just a cursory listen to Elektra Records Singer/Songwriter Project which Blue recorded under his real name Cohen) will show it: his early classic I Like to Sleep Late in the Morning, Don't Get Caught in a Storm, and especially More Good Men Going Down (a song repeatedly referenced by Eric Andersen as an inspiration for his own Blind Fiddler) show a flat voice that is not an imitation of Dylan, as it is a revelation of their common roots (Dock Boggs, and especially for Blue, Luke Faust.) The writing derives from no one but Blue, as far as I can discern; those are his unique turns of phrase, as shown in later albums, when his own style reasserted itself.

So the question is really, Why? Why, in heaven's name, would someone put aside his own distinctive style, and deliberately choose to embody the sound of the Big Kahuna's most iconic period, for his own debut album--the album that should have been the opening statement of his own artistic strengths and concerns?

At the risk of playing armchair psychologist, I would guess that Blue, as an overweight misfit in a troubled family situation, struck out for the New York of 1960, intent on become an actor. How many before and after him came for the same reason--to express themselves in a medium that would allow them to 'forget' themselves by assuming other characters? In doing so, what Blue found was a congenial atmosphere for unbridled creativity. It was also where he first made the acquaintance of another young man working out his own creative intents--Bob Dylan. We know now from various sources that it was Blue who aided Dylan in the composition of Blowin' in the Wind by strumming the chords over and over as Dylan completed the lyrics (a service not unlike the one Al Kooper performed for Dylan while he worked out the lyrics for Blonde on Blonde in a Nashville motel room.) It seems Blue was overwhelmed by Dylan's creative powers and his force of personality, resulting in a subject Blue the actor could emulate. A lasting misfortune for Blue the singer-songwriter.

It would take a longer piece of exegesis to examine these ramifications, because after that first album, Blue put together a group called the American Patrol which proved to be the forerunner of glam and other, more theatrical modes of rock performance. This was followed by These 23 Days of September, which showed Blue's own originality resurfacing, but still hampered by Blue's physical emulation of Dylan's 1966 appearance, i.e. the high teased hair. By the time his next 3 albums--his greatest work (Me, recorded under the name of S. David Cohen; Stories and Nice Baby and the Angel) --surfaced, they were rounded ignored, despite Rolling Stone hailing Stories, as one of the best albums of 1972. The damage had been done, and Blue's achievement would ever be obscured by the "Dylan clone" tag.

Maybe one day, I, or someone, will get around to writing a real piece of work analyzing the validity and value of that achievement--how even on the debut album, songs like The Street, Midnight Through Morning and Grand Hotel pointed less toward Dylan's surrealism and more to Blue's own growth as an artist and the expansion of his own powers (at the very least, showing the world there was way more to him than Outlaw Man, thanks to the Eagles's cover of that vaunted tune.)

In the meanwhile, Blue has surfaced on YouTube (a live recording of So Easy She Goes By from a performance at the Unicorn and numerous posts of Blue singing and talking with Jackson Browne on a radio show) as well as a MySpace page that has live performances that may be the recorded remains of the American Patrol.

No, he wasn't the game-changer his frenemy Dylan was, but the self-assessment of that other Dylan--Thomas, to be sure--as "the captain of the second eleven" might apply here--he was strong, unique and nothing like Dylan when you gave a close listen, as was the case with so many succeeding "New Dylans". The Mass Mind will always be lazy and sniping, content with surface trivialities to pin an image in the public consciousness, easily digestible bites of bull that our current electronic medium has legitimized to such unreasonable extremes.

May David Blue finally prevail against all that. He, and we, deserve better.


Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito

Monday, November 29, 2010

taking time out

for mercy

even though

the clock

keeps running

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
hope is

beating a

dead heart

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

If I had wisdom

I'd keep silent

so this blog

and its autistic terror

affirms my idiothood--

and you have

no clue how good it feels

to be one with my fellow fellows

yapping away like mad

to what end I'll leave

the wise to figure out

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
how easily I play the fool

call it a gift

I play it as easily as

one breathes

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I still can't believe two readers posted comments on this blog--

(one praising my work in stating how moved one was by it and posted links

"in support" of the work--and the other a playwright who was "familiar with

[my] work for years" and wanted to use one or two pieces in a project--)

and I didn't find out until a year later (just recently in face--stumbling on

the comments tab and checking it out because I slog through writing

this stuff and never imagine anyone reading or caring about it)--

how idiotic of me--but then my karma seems

to require that I be done down in life--

to miss opportunities or to seize opportunities and have them

come to nothing --

and then people I know think I'm being 'negative' or 'pessimistic'

or whatever kind of bullshit--let them wind up over their entire lives

constantly 'a day late and a dollar short' and then let them come back

and talk to me about 'positive thinking' and whatever other nonsense

they think will allow them to evade God's last word on everything--

and to my two readers--erstwhile or not--I'm sorry for any

unintentional rudeness in failing to respond--I only knew of your comments too late--

and isn't that typical after all--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I wish I could convince you I mean what I say

But there's a bat in your family tree

And that is enough to undo all effort and defeat me

For even if you weren't deaf you wouldn't understand me anyway

So how could I say what I mean and mean it

Who but a fool could spew truth and in his yammer--demean it

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Friday, November 26, 2010

So clear's so impossibly clear I could kick myself for hesitating to confront the knowledge or for wondering whether my instincts were correct...but now I'm I'm sure I don't I'm sure I don't know anything except the blindness of my vanity...the remorse of my clear now...don a spiritual fake nose...brush off the dust...make a fresh start and beat a hasty retreat forward...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Friday, November 19, 2010

my shames and wastes and losses mean nothing now--

I have endured a gauntlet tossed carelessly lifetimes ago

to land here and now in this time and place--

and now it has been despatched will all the will

of a sleepy child drowsing upon awakening

as the last images of dream dissipate--

it has been lifted and thrown back--I disaffiliate--

I hold no truck with the insanity of humanity--

I've played the fool enough for my taste--

let karma have more devastating tricks played on me--

I'm broke and if the heavens wish to afflict me further

let them rifle my pockets for lint--

like many before me I regret waking up and figuring

some matters out so late in a lifetime--

lesson learned as time runs out to repent--

but there's more than this sojourn--

more than this skin--

exactly what remains to be--and when I get there

I may not recognize it--but all the foolishness that is a little

too much the content of my history--

it means nothing now--

this--right here right now--is the deal--

so deal--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito

Thursday, November 18, 2010

I gave so much thought to transcendence

that I remained earthbound and preternaturally mundane

if thou canst imagine such

I couldn't stand my ordinary mind nor endure my routine fate

yet every undeveloped notion

or ideas left in unrealized potential

freeze like gargoyles lining a hallway to a death chamber

such gloomy thoughts are mere afterthought

remnants of my past life when everything annoyed me

and I had no patience or love for anything

oh to look back now and see the childish pattern of belief

pressed into the moment like a branding iron into oxhide

and realize how foolish the pitiful yearning to disappear

into an idea of God looks to one grateful now he was

not spurned nor outcast for long when I find my destination

I'll let you know about it

provided I can stay long enough to dispatch the message

but I think with no thought on what can only be called

the Infinite and no longer am bound to anywhere

one laser intuition raising the meaning of thought

into active awareness comfortably earthbound for my term

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
all that remains in the ire of failure

is the muttering ghost of success

while the faithless snicker at its tatters

and easily ignore the phantasmagoria

we call angels and souls of earlier incarnations--

oh how the pride rankles now...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milityo.
how easily I fumble--how surely I fall--

the message I've awaited for years

coming just when I go to the toilet--

the vocation poleaxed by the fate that assures my failure

a carcass picked clean by the wind--

the aspiration short-circuited as my effort to attain it

watches empty-handed as the opportunity is snatched away--

even if this collapse opens a way out and renews my will--

to easily fumble and to surely fall

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I always regret not being a chosen one--

a blessing to buffoons while I struggle in my iron vest--

ah and there's the vanity mean and protective

that keeps me a prisoner outside my own shrine

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

almost two years hammering at this blog

and I've learned

the themes are always shifting

the point of view changing

and the start of a day rarely

resembles its end--

just as we are now what we weren't a second ago

and that second as far passed

as ancient Egypt or Rome--

almost two years and it still feels like now...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
awareness has tied my tongue

I cannot believe my own rap

now I have to be a stranger to myself

though one who knows me better than I do...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
for a------ who loved my poems

and for M-- who wished to reference some in a work--

forgive me I discovered your comments to this blog

over a year after you left them--

I never bother checking comments--almost never think to check--

because until yesterday I couldn't imagine anyone reading my stuff--

then I stumbled upon them and though filled with gratitude

that some had received these poems and a little shame

for my unintended rudeness toward you both

I now feel a little self-conscious as if I were babbling

in a closet and someone overheard me--

the need to express and the shame in expressing

but thank you nonetheless

for loving the words that come through me--

at least this endeavor--sometimes uncomfortable for me--

isn't in vain--

(p.s. to Mr. Lonely: I like your blog, also...)

oh, the many mouths of one voice...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Everything here is closing down

Which could only mean

That somewhere else

Everything there is opening up

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
You'd be amazed how easily we all botch our intentions--

How could we not?

We proceed as if we knew what we were doing

And wind up in the heap of our own waste--

Swept away like the remaining shells left over

From previous creations--

We figured on everything except the inherent truths

Of other worlds and dimensions

And our own perceived lack of totality--

What hot wizards we be--lost the gold and lost the Gold

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
It almost doesn't matter what will come of anything

Whatever thing or event has had its day

And as more come they do will have their moment

And be gone--why is this basic truth such a terror to so many?

You know nothing but your moment--and it is all

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I can only do what I'm allowed

What do I allow myself?

Notions of holiness on high?

Or the simplest compassion down here?

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
Now what do you want?

Haven't you learned anything?

To want is not to have

To gain is to lose

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
You thought I was gone

I thought so too

But the fates aren't finished

With me or with you

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
I wait to cease from struggle

I struggle but cannot wait to cease

Cease struggle for I wait

Struggle I cease to wait

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

my concerns have exceeded the scope of this blog

I will return to it--

but as part of a larger


I'm glad to be nearing death

at least that a release back to higher truer Life--

to live in this world the way it is now

is like being fully truly REALLY dead

no afterlife no soul left--

every generation thinks its good times were the best--

that's a load--we had sex drugs and rock'n'roll--

trying beating that you imbeciles--

and for what comes next--well let's see what we weave for ourselves--

let's see what God will allow--

let's see nothing but the backsides of the brain-dead

as they wreck the earth we leave in sorrow

because it was a beautiful place and maybe one day

God will be big enough to admit the blunder

in giving free choice to people who only know

the slavery of their sad minds--

my concerns are elsewhere now

thank God the time draws nearer every second

and for you earth-bound with no understanding of anything--

go ahead and mock--as (somewhere) already given

I'll be happier to go

than you'll be to see me leave--

'sall right baby I'll catch you down the line...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito

america has finally suicided itself

let's salute the nazis who've destroyed this country

in the name of power and greed and anger and stupidity

next time the markets collapse and the world winds up

worse than it is now

who will these psychos blame then?

this is one tired (and obviously ignored) blogger

signing off from what is the former United States of America (R.I.P.)

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

new world

new path

the shift will be hard

on everyone

I will talk of other things

in other ways now

as all of us find our places

or go off looking for them

I'll tell you what I see

and we'll go on from there

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

with everything I've known and loved utterly gone

what is left but to be gone as well?

the ages of the world progress

and we are ground to pieces in that process--

even those with strength and validity to keep up

will eventually be overwhelmed--

let those coming in now

make what mess they will of the world--

we had our chance and screwed up royally

as does every generation-

it's the way the damn thing's built--

you cannot win at this table (as has been given)

and you are not meant to--

you are here to do your time--

you are here to get over yourself--

you are here to prevail--

and you will--just not here in this earth--

we'll all see each other again

at some point down the line--

until then--keep your spiritual grip packed--

you never know when you'll be gone...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Monday, October 25, 2010

I'd loathe to be put upon

any longer any more

but unfortunately

it is in the fine print

of the earthly contract

it is part of the architecture


(in case you didn't get it...

and don't blame me because

I didn't want it)

no leg to howl on

we all were bamboozled

and that in basic business talk

is what I loathe

whatcha call yer humid conditioner

(will somebody please show this one the door...

er I

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
whoever holds the bigger megaphone

has the attention of deaf dummies

(our blessed electorate who sell out

their country and their world

for the gutted illusions of their own hungers--)

the bigger megaphone gives strength

to loud-mouthed losers whose grasping hands

reach for that megaphone in lust and pride--

they want to be KING--

they want to be BOSS--

they want to show everybody--

they must be stopped--

right-thinking people should drop

their megaphones and get

spine transplants

to rip the bigger megaphone

from the hands of those power-mad

and beat them senseless with it

as they do unto others...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philikp Milito.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

any time now

any one of us will discover

time called and that's it you're done

prepare for that time

be ready in that instant

it's already here

waiting for you to come...

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

so here we go yet again yet again

you 'decent' 'hard-working' American

is turning from what will help

and trying to bring back into power the very

evil that has done them down

political commentary is useless

activist is useless (it's only on bad tyranny

replacing another) and the failure of democracy

is evident in the will of brain-dead morons...

I'd say 'goodbye america' except

it's already dead and gone--persists in name only

among those who've trampled the ideals

this country was built upon--

and all because some new haircut they've voted for

turned out to mean what he said about change

and wasn't the savior who'd wave a wand and fix everything

so your 'brain-dead' constituencies could evade their responsibility--

and once more we see the history of this rotten rock played out

as your 'decent ordinary citizens' can undermine the very freedoms

that let them run rampant in their evil greed and plain-out stupidity...

let them have it!

we all get what's coming to us

and who help us here it comes


Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

people mistake


for oppression--

on the contrary

it is fully conscious


and the ultimate

in self-mastery--

no freedoms

no restraints

just moving in the vectors

of your own being

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

...and how it will be--what will happen next--

and what the hell just happened?

break backs every chance you get

but remember the day will come

for yours to snap--

humanity must be crazy--

how the same thing must be said

over and over--

time and again--

and look! LOOK! the old fool's at it again!--

let us remember him fondly

deaf and peaceful

as what next becomes what now?

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the webs of power

are the tangled bloodlines

of political foes--

what 10th cousins

(once removed)

bring all their history

to bear on history

the inbred chokehold

on destiny

the will of kings against

the will of the One--

pity those who by breathing

merely do their part--

intent revised

with each advance through the ages--

and each awakening to awareness

a fresh pump of power

through the blood--

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

the moment counts now--

our whole life we knew this is so

but only at this time of life

can we attend to its actuality

beyond what we believe

or want to believe--

the light is bright and dull--

hazy sky in the afternoon heat

this moment counts and we count on it--

we've all seen our best days--

and only in the moment

is it of no concern

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
how it came to pass

and how quickly

and how long ago now

cannot even be trusted

to memory

let alone understanding

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
why sing out

if no one hears

or wants to hear?

for the sake of who has ears?

they already know

and need no word

it is the singer who must hear silence

the better to sing the music of the spheres

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.
the ultimate end of things

so far beyond our imagining

we can only do our usual mischief

in the mistaken notion we are progressing

along the path of our purposes

is waiting for us nonetheless

it is and always has been and now our continued stumbling

on the way to that ultimate apotheosis

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.