Friday, March 29, 2013


another floating day

with images of my past

and the sounds that preserved them

caught in the tapping tangle

of bare branches and certain plays

of light against the buildings

and how could anything matter

on this day beyond our mere control

that can only chip and nick

surfaces we chosen for our contact

with the matter that encases us?

you can lie with your mouth but not with your heart

our petty damages hurt only us in the long run

and will not happen if you but float with the day...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


the slightest glimmer of enlightenment is:

God runs the game...

it is you who chooses whether

to hold or to fold

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


we all have our various stratagems

for dealing with this inhospitable world

you don't hurt me and

I won't hurt you

how much more basic

can it get than that?

it's only when we think too much

that we fiddle with small perfections

and ruin the masterpiece over which we slave...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


the street corner cranks say

we live in the Anti-Christ's Time...

barring only the florid mythology

I can't say they're wrong

you can't do anything...can't walk down the street

can't go to the store without some spy camera

recording your every move...making note of your license plate number...

tracking you by computer to every place you visit

to target you for prizes...giveaways...interagency probes...

and they got there and control all infrastructure

by the indifferent consent of the average joe assholes

who'll never in this life master his hungers and feed his starved brain

grooming his children instead for a servitude to some infernal machine

that would take more to bring down than some naive idealists

suiciding themselves against the corporate fortresses

to become a useless symbol of opposition...

yes you can tell I am from another age when there were possibilities

to damage this complex...but even then your average joe asshole

sabotaged every effort to instill justice...and even helped the conquering powers

stay in power...and so on this Good Friday we remember

the ultimate rebel who was brought to death by these very traitors to life

and it is our lot to live in their clueless CEO's idea of a Millennium

in this treacherous conformity many truly think is Oneness

it's always been so...there have always been scabs...there have always been Judas...

but the technology these days make them truly invincible...

I'll waste no more time wondering why God allows this or anything

if the liability is truly on each of us then damn it do what you must

for this too shall pass is mighty cold comfort when it is your time

to endure this seemingly undefeatable evil...

cash in your soul why don't you for a heart of stone...

and a promotion code that will give you the chance to win

a million shares of dead soul points toward a heavenly reward

a limited time offer...void where prohibited...and certainly

a chance to shovel shit in some other bracket...Happy New Age my darlings...

Content (c) 20082013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I was honest and fair and kind and forgiving

and all I got for my pains was a three-inch-wide asshole...

go the right thing...

just know you'll be asking for trouble...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Thursday, March 28, 2013


if I were God

I'd like to think I'd be

a lot sweeter about things

less the tyrant who demands

total obedience and no questions brooked

lest I plummet in grace

we have complete liability for our acts

and it is on us to judge and repent of ourselves

and God lifts not a finger but to enforce the penalty

I love consciousness so I had better swallow my pride

if I want to live forever

even knowing I am the least of men has a certain arrogance

to it that disqualifies me from grace

that comes only when it is not so selfishly desired

oh One is this how we accept mercy as

a visage of judgment? as if it were possible for any of us to know...

if I were God

I wouldn't be this sad soul projecting his meek desires

on the vast processes of creation

that are the very heartbeat of Life itself...

one day I hope to be wise...and strong...and brave enough

to understand I am always part of the God I wish to join...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


is there someone here I cannot respect

for destroying all he touches and congratulates himself

on the unseemly horror?

the world is ever filled with these unholy selfish

who are so empty of spirit all they can do

to feel any worth is to kill another for their peace...

let them come after blood on their hands

will give them the hell they've so effortlessly earned...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


my nostalgia is exhausted

what was actual only once in infinity

is preserved in the mind and on the soul

of who experienced that blessed (or not)

singular event and in that

it lives as long as the participant does

so I can no longer yearn for what has been...

how can I when I have it within me always?

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


none can give you a guarantee

that salvation will be smooth and light

you'll struggle with your own misery

in the darkness of your own fight

pray for nothing that is not yours

to have or to covet or to receive

if destruction is all your heart adores

then expect no prayer your pain to relieve...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


long and slow

hard and dirty

yet we're told nothing

is unclean of itself

weakened and beaten

soft on the ground

we die of ourselves

in dying of each other

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


this one hates that one

and each prays to God

to kill the other

such brotherhood

makes one wonder why

Christ even bothered

out of this weave

what hope to believe?

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013


converts are so hard on others

because even though they've converted

their hungers and their weakness

still rage under the righteousness

take them with a proverbial grain of salt

even if they get nasty about it

take what you need to hear from them and leave them

to their you'll be left to yours...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


your head says no

but every fiber of your being

ignores the head and reaches

for its liquor its drugs its cunt its cock

its pillow to clutch and corner to suck

you follow your heart down to its pit

and think it's your own choice

but sometimes the heart says one thing

and the head says another and it turns out

your head was right...could you bear that

if you sought an answer to your hunger

fed by griefs and doubts and fears beyond mastery

because you waited for something else to happen?

nothing happens but this...what you do and how you'll do...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


the reformers and the 'feel-good' philosophers

mean well (let's give them

the benefit of the doubt)

but each 'brand new dawn of your life'

follows some old night ending

and will itself be an ending night some day...

so it's no pass...what are you

going to do today?

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Monday, March 25, 2013


the constant vow

of the weak

"I'll be strong tomorrow

but let me have

today to repent and pity..."

and oh yet again

each day when

tomorrow never comes...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.





(just to get


about it)

would not believe

the shit I've endured

or maybe they would

and that's why

they sound like

they do

and why I listen

and emulate too (where I can...)

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


5 days into spring this year

is but an extension of winter...

the light kitchen light dim

as I look out the window

at the dim gray morning

I love mornings like this...

but I also like the seasons

when they are supposed to happen...

CXontent (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I played with the idea

that I was invisible

then realized I could not float...

have I got time on my hands!?

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I was given a choice

between living in the past

and projecting into the future

there was no need to choose...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


the wise man hides his wisdom...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Miligto. All rights reserved.


no one awake

but that's o.k.

I need all the wiggle-room

I can manage

I steal out at dawn

to watch the sun rise

but someone finishing

his night shift

is always around

sticking a nose

where it should not be

keeping an eye out

on his walk home

for anyone who's not going home...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I miss the black-and-white world

where judgment is easy

and justice is a tool for vengeance

but at some point I strayed

over a line and found myself

praised for what I failed at

and blamed for what I did right

there's a reason I keep

my own thinking to myself

just walking out in the open

is both good hiding and an invitation

to catastrophe at once

and my occupation of the gray zone of some void

is no help or pardon...

Content (c) 20080-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


victims and oppressors

share a common face

and circumstance dictates

who is who

in any given situation

so your friend and your foe

may be one and the same

depending on what's given and received...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Friday, March 22, 2013


now for sure

the long day takes its toll

hard thought

and long heartache

with every desire resolving itself

in the fading twilight

I know now what I want

I want to close my eyes and dream

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


great minds

have nothing on my mind

we all ponder the terms

we all draw the same blank

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


such futile rage

when you become aware

of the complicity of all

in the wreckage of the earth

no matter what each

individual mind thinks it's doing

the breakage is huge with every

careless sweep of the hand

and that is the dismay

when you know how it is

rage and awareness

complicity and wreckage

thinking mind and careless hand

that is the dismay

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I have no love

for the world as it is

but it is what it is

and I suffer because

I have no love for it...

within this layer of worldly filth

is the gold of the divine

and the more the shine is hidden

then I and the world

remain blind...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All right reserved.

Thursday, March 21, 2013


there is some mastery of my emotions

necessary to move forward

in my soul's progression

but I cannot do it yet

one moment I rave and curse God

and everything in creation for being foul and false

and the next moment the anger passes

and remorse reminds me I've again failed

to master my hurts and all it means to God

is a tally of plus and minus I must balance

if I am to achieve some measure

of forgiveness and grace...

bearing all liability even though God created everything

set all patterns and is the very life force

flowing through and sustaining all of us

though we cannot say so without 'falling from grace' as they say...

and so each day...ready or not...a damnation or salvation

swinging like a metronome to the tune of each

ordinary eternal day...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


the ravening power-mad neanderthals

of the National Rifle Association

the evil brutish mongrels of low soul

and less spirit

and all the spineless cowards in the U.S. Congress

who kowtow to these mongols

to keep their jobs of fleecing the very constituents

who elected them to look out for the common good

and each individual 'citizen' who espouses this

unmitigated hatred

uncaring of all civilized concord...

I wish each and every one of them to rot

in their own hells

and if God Almighty Him/Her/Itself

will not forgive me for not being enlightened enough

to turn the other cheek and bless my enemies

then let it be so...if I have to suffer for doing the right thing

then be damned for doing the right thing

then let God be alone at the end of creation's term

demanding the impossibilities we cannot rise to...

there may be some ultimate judgement on these evil bastards

but it will come too late to do any of us

any good...who try like fools to do good

only to be done down by tricksters from God

down to the least of his...oh who who who

help us when we ourselves  who must help ourselves

are denied?

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013


all has gone well lately

connections made

no misunderstandings

accord in love

and social concourse

and I savored the moment

fleeting as spring snow

with no thought for what hell will follow...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


bridges aid us in crossing over

but not from here to somewhere else

wherever we go we are still here

and the bridges are still here also

so go through stages and look at them

different and familiar at once

you are only crossing from here to here

on bridges that are nowhere else...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


for you thought in terms

of somewhere else

and sometime other

know the only instant

in which your thought

and your act fuse

into one doing

that is your choice

whether to do it or not...

in what moment

you make your choice

know that it is permanent

with such permanence as permanence has

in the only now there is

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Sunday, March 17, 2013


and now to start all over again...

because I thought I knew better

in my delusion of a life

I'm told God is patient and merciful

but I know it's until patience and mercy

run out...and then we stand with our burdens

like someone who got to the dock

in time to see the ship pull out and set off...

and now to start all over again...

thinking only of 'might-have-beens'

with the occasional joyous memory

popping up in mind

to remind us in wasn't all in vain

and it is on that that we start over again...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


to renew

to be reborn

just let go

of your total past

and actually do

what you must

exactly when you must...

think it's easy?

a snap of the fingers?

a trembling in the knees?

it's so simple and easy

no one can help but fuck it up...

and somewhere in that ruin

renewal...rebirth...if you can do it...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


someone's awake and tracking me

whoever you are

I hope your day

turns out better

than mine

you have plenty to see

I've nothing left to do

I should be following you...

whether you're better off or not...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.






the inner realm

the Outer Darkness

the stubborn resistance

the simple obedience

the way in

the way out

in the way

which way now



Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I was expecting something else

when I crossed over

but it looks no different than here

and all the time in creation

to strip away all the misconceptions

that diminished what I knew to be true

and guessing with all the confusion of flesh

just what it was I was expecting...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


empty hands

but for the stains

of previous mischief


and other outrages

against those who loved me

but I couldn't believe it

until my hands were empty...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Friday, March 15, 2013


you will find me

right where you left me…

blank in the morning sun

with visions

of endless nights

still alive in my nerves

and dull in another life

as you again approach

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.



a touch of rage

blind hatred against fate

still a little bit

of resentment

at wising up to Reality

cannot accept it

at this moment...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. all rights reserved.



in the name of all that's 'allegedly' holy

is there no scheduled release in America

for the film


I know what's wrong this sickening country

that denies its own birthright

every opportunity...but why this?

son of O'Brien who together with him worked out

some of the basic concepts of cinematic magic?

is Harryhausen yet a prophet without honor in his own country?

and what about the big shot talking heads in the film?

the Jacksons? the Spielbergs? the Camerons?

these high and mighty jerk-offs can't work

a distribution deal for this man they so claim to worship?

maybe I should say the hell with it and hope I come

across it at some point before I die...

because I am reminded in this

that the true greats are not fully respected

let along understood

and being left to the side like this

can only re-affirm his greatness...praise being

such a false self-serving thing to the disciples

who can never hope to really measure up...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013


nothing ever completely finished

done and dusted

accounted for and dismissed

we have threads to unravel

well into what is to be

and how we unravel them affects

how it is to be...


nothing is ever really finished

at least until the amendment is complete

the price paid

the lesson learned

and all the bitterness of ego dissolves

into the healing power of the One...see you there?

I hope so...for me...for you...for all of us...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


Once again among you

I have wailed and denounce and lamented--

now I must return--to repent--to confess--to atone--

hard as this transition will be--may it not be worse than what we've known previously--

life will continue one way or another and what is to come

will reflect what has been--but not to be repeated--nor reinstated--

I've been outcast too long--will I be forgiven my ingratitude?

will I finally forget the price of disloyalty to those who trusted me?

finally forget the sufferings and loneliness of my separation?

will I be taken back in, and go out no more?

our time in the earth is ending and the term is closing--

it's a long way to go if you don't know where you've been--

I await the final word of my liege--may I not doubt my own words

of confession--may I no longer abuse the grace that has protected me all along—

that was me—ages ago—an outcast—a Wraecca as the Olde English would call the wandering exile—

pompous even to himself I was—

and oh what do I have to show for it but a ground’s eye view of a misty park this fine late winter evening—and lampposts like lit dandelions—ablaze with spores of seed-snow trembling to join a breeze through the deserted night
as he—I that is—felt pulling in the brain clashing memories that resembled each other in the guises of various times—

all this agitation in the soothing dampness of  a night—where now a cleft forms in the air over the park—a glowing sheen of moonlight surging brighter then dimming—brighter then dimming—radiates in that pocket of fog—then fades away as the air again comes together and the mist again dominates—

and in all this instant—I who was he—and I who was she—but always always I—we all stay in this moment just a moment longer—but before again I must move forward—before I again must move on—

how much I’ve longed to escape the physical world—how much I wanted to flee the pain and the suffering of this lowest level of creation—with the densest concentration of energy and the heavy drag of flesh and matter destroying any hope of transcendence—

but no—it’s not like that—oh poor deluded ignoramus I am—here is here and now is now and oh so much illusion to strip away to even begin to live as we should—

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


good morning...

I know I'm keeping you awake

but once you're up

you'll join the chorus...

be alto to my bass

be complimentary counterpoint

to the main theme...good morning...

love smoothes all our wild peeps

into grace notes...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


love is never lost...

how own bitterness and hatreds

must somewhere along the line

be given up and forgotten

be atoned for and forgiven

our liability is our crushing burden

but while our regret and bitterness will fade

love at least will never be lost...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


how long and hard to change one's mind...

all one believed needing to be



set to realization

their is no other 'world'

no other place

than right here right now...

there's no escaping anything

this is what it is to be alive

to be in all the snares of perfection

that rule us beyond our ability

to remember and continue...

and how long and hard it is to awaken to the fact and live it...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013


oh how hard (at least for me)

to overcome pride and intolerance

of other's shortcomings when I myself

am at the mercy of my own unfailing faults...

I claim no superior position

I know I've done wrong

but it is so entwined with what I knew

(or thought I knew) had to be rightly done

that I'm as flummoxed any other soul

facing all the righteousness that turned out to be

bad disguise for ignorance and selfishness...

oh what to do now that won't add to my error?

all I can do is keep as honest accounting as I'm able...

and (woe to my inner control freak) just let it be...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I'm still paralyzed

by the realization...the actual realization...

of my immortality

and all the dense responsibility that goes with it...

never are we off some hook...

never are we excused from any consideration...

we are One and we are All

and oh the despair of enduring those not awake to this ultimate reality...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


having awoken to reality

there is much in mind

that must be adjusted

I too believed in a merciful

God of Grace and Forgiveness

but I did not know

that God does not judge...

it is we who judge ourselves

and an entire change of thought

must now be in order to even begin

to atone because eternity is here and now...always...

even released from the material world

life is no different 'there' as 'here'

we are always responsible for all we do...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


so fifty years on

and this cracker scumbag

may be rotting in the hell of his own making

good let him suffer like all crackers before him

bigoted hateful white Christian scumbags

who murder in the name of Jesus

and God gives them a pass...

but damn it damn it DAMN IT

that we live in a creation that demands we judge ourselves

and we think we owe nothing to anybody

I'm not begging God for my life

my own inability to forgive is my own striggle

and a work in progress for who but this God knows

how many more lifetimes...

but damn the evil of righteous bigots

damn the evil of their murderous egos

they won't be brought to heel soon enough to suit me

but then...I put faith in  a cartoon god

when I should have put faith in myself

my road to atonement is long

but Zanzinger and his ilk have a longer tougher row to hoe

damn them damn them DAMN THEM

for the hell they make of the earth

and let the God who sits on His hands

and leaves all liability on us

have NOTHING to say...

we face our own shit...but Lord will YOu allow

flowers to sprout????

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Monday, March 11, 2013


no waiting for miracles

not of our own making

no help or love

unless we have given help and love

as given time and time before

we make our own heavens and hells

to be brave and strong and wise enough

to understand and correct lies all and only

in our help and our love

for all beyond ourselves...

oh the toughest test of the ego

to acknowledge our Oneness

and find one's own salvation

in the loving of another...

Content (c ) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


you live in eternity

there is no here or there

there is no heaven or hell

there is only here

profoundly here

no God on a judgment throne

meting out punishment or reward

your own conscience calls the shots

your own conscience sees clearly

when all the confusion

of flesh lifts from your mind

and you see you are no different

than you were in the flesh

your quirks your procivilities

your personality all and always the same

but without the material attachment

as if this world of sorrows were all there was

it's here it's real

but only the densest from of energy

a 'black hole' for our souls

to be drawn into for testing and fine-tuning

but more merciful than a 'black hole'

because the material plane you can

work your way out of...

all liability is on us

and no questioning why life is formed

the way it is...

and knowing this isn't enough...

life is active and continuous

until we atone and amend enough

to leave these processes behind...

the choice is yours...stay bound to the wheel

or free yourself to what easy it's almost impossible

for no matter where we are or what we do

we do it here and now on all levels of creation we eternity...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Sunday, March 10, 2013


here in the earth

or above in the finer dimensions

my load is my load

and the only judgment

is my own

maybe now I'll find out

where I erred and where I advanced

but I'm the only one who knows

where I was true or where I was false

and where I end up is my responsibility

God gives you more than enough rope

so you have the choice of hanging yourself

or tying everything up and be done with it

moving beyond any idea of heaven with which you've fooled yourself...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


Cohen is a King of Poetry...

fuck Academia

and their approved vasemakers

their art is trivial beyond consumption

fit only for high-minded liars

who'll write a poem to your suffering

while you sink into the bog...

Leonard got loose

Leonard got free

and he's lived a real life

at the mercy of border guards

and chiseling managers

and nights in prisons of heart and cunt

he knows the root where spirit and flesh

tussle in a holy scrimmage

wherever every slip could deliver you

to an abyss or the Almighty

Leonard I see you shining

on a holy mountain of merde

trying to lure the energy of certain saps

out of the ground these bodies will embrace

after every stratagem fails

and all that soothes the pain is the burn of desire

transmuted to aspiration for the eternal machinery

grinding out the processes that give us

our fields of memory where we were love in action

now as Leonard winds down in his time

I see a glowing around his body that suggests

his beginning to take shape and his crown

left for his progeny who will aspire and pass after him

let's hope God will be gladened by his arrival

I'll follow soon with a mouthful of song

I could never quite manage before

a King of Poetry paving our way for us...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


in flesh or in spirit

whittling down

the load of karma

in the Eternal Now

is done in pure service

to others...

I'd forgotten that in this skin

and now will probably start

all over again

in genuine contrition

to repent and amend

atone for all the foolishness

that led me from my path

sorrow and remorse

unless as ice in the sun

and replaced by the souls I've loved

coming to help me across...

it's true...all true...

and the pain fades to wistfulness

as the shadow world of earthly reality

is subsumed into its pure idea...

and we are here...all here...

we are never anywhere else...

in flesh or in spirit we are here...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


letting go

a lifetime of error

a lifetime

of confusion and doubt

I stand


not sure if I've given all

or can now truly receive...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Saturday, March 9, 2013


I howl in my frustration

I can't be near you

I can't be with you

and I don't know

whether you'd want me to be

but you haunt every waking hour

more grandly as we're apart

you stand before me a million miles away...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


dark nights of the soul

I'm totally accustomed to...

in fact I love the darkness

more than the light

the light shows plain the impossibility

of God's mercy

while the darkness soothes the hurt

by letting you imagine mercy...

and oh either way leads you forward

it's an instant's choice

whether we sink ourselves or rise

the way up or down being one and the same

will it be our sense of reality leads us to perdition

while our imaginations forge a way to heaven?

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I accepted a greater load than I can handle

and there is no divine mercy

for such an error of well-meant atonement

what good I've realized

I have no damned idea of...

but I know additional burdens

have been weighed with me...

had I but known god was not love

but judgment beyond bearing

and sin beyond atoning...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013


I can be gone in at any moment

and you could also...

let us rejoice in this instant

and not worry about

what more to come...

all time and space is in our embrace

and we stand in the very spot

where others have and others will...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


who follows after me

will learn nothing fresh

other than what we all learn

on our stumbling path

our progress is up to us

and so is our backsliding

no one else's foolishness should matter

when we have our own with which to contend...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


why is it

the more I feel like I'm dying

the livelier and happier I feel?

the body's last stand

is the soul's first move?

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I've pushed to the edge

looked over the precipice

to an abyss that dropped me

a moon

God is one wicked joker

I'll give you that

I feel like Sarge holding a shrub in the cliffside

waiting for Beetle Bailey to bring a rope...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.
I'm busting to talk

but so few are on this wavelength

I might as well talk to myself

yet for all the stray off-channel signals

that drift in

I'm persuaded to keep it up

I'll never know who hears but then

it may not be mine to know...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.
I'm amazed I'm still on the earth

people say I don't take good enough

care of myself

but does it matter when no assaults

on the self

can defy whatever time has been allotted

for this time in the worldly prison

where self learns its worst and must rejoice...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Phiulip Milito. All rights reserved.


beasts run free

but are unopposed

because they walk on their hind legs

a courtesy and an acknowledgment...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


we laugh

we cry

if we knew why

we'd surely die

the weight is too much

and it will not lighten

and after a lifetime

an escape can only frighten

it is not in our hands

it is beyond our control

no one wishes to understand

all want to push it past all bounds

they all want it whole

but they'll get is their  plot in the ground...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I'm fascinated by

the extent of mass hypnosis

that keeps people

content in their chains

not that being a

free-range ersatz mystic

has any great perks

but it is simply

another large yard

in which to shuffle and peck

little red rooster

strutting among the hens

this is what I get for resisting

the line drawn in the dirt...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013


I've no idea when I'll be called

out of this skin and away from this time

it could come in the next 30 seconds

or the next 30 years...

I hope it will be on a mild sunny day

like today is in this neck of the world

but then March is always so changeable

and they're calling for snow tomorrow

any day I go will be fine...

I'll still be here...profoundly here...

as poets and mystics have always said

all is always here and now

then we'll be here wherever we are

and all doubt is unfounded...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved


hard to accept

one's place in the mess

ever one's ego in the way

of one's own place in one's self

which is it's true place

in All That Is

how much illusion to peel away

before one stands eternal in the everlasting day...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights resrevd.


how sweet to read

of repentance and redemption

while your life of error

drags you habitually back

into the very shit you're trying

to transcend

and the grace you thought a miracle

is something different

a sustenance through lifetimes

as you work your way

up through matter's residue

to cleanse the soul...make it new...

very well may you transcend

but with much effort and not until the end...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.




such veneration

of deep penetration

is sign of surrender

is the prayer from the sender

of meaning assured

to the loved and adored...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


nothing changes...

only our view

only our capacity

only our grief at the crushing facts of

our complicity in each’s downfall

such is the world

such is life

we learn our lessons

and each of us

is the other’s lesson.

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


God probably thought it

a good idea to have us love one another…

but you must admit

there’s something about good ideas

that get swamped

by the very evils they are meant to counter…

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Monday, March 4, 2013


I have something to tell you

but I've forgotten it

something to do with getting

real and facing your shit like an adult

ah I remember what made me forget...

that part about being an adult...

heh what horseshit...

we're twelve years old our entire lives

and promises of heaven sound like tall tales

told  by a drunken uncle who wants to squeeze your peeshe

and be absolved by the rest of the family

for being the wastrel...the barfly disgrace...

shit...what hooey people come up with to excuse themselves

and call it self-forgiveness...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


why are you crying now?

don't you know

everyone gets it and everyone's tired of it?

your sadness and heartache

are not unique

and people you look down on

have managed better than you have

stop haven't discovered anything fresh...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I'm listening at this moment

to Dusty Springfield...

God what a powerful voice...

subtle shaded but absolute tonal control

to bring the soft whisper up to

brilliant flare without any loss

of impact

as if all sides of the emotion

were side by side

waiting for their turn to speak

but not polite about it...

just the pure essence at full volume

graceful in its placement of expression

(how pedantic this sounds next to the experience)

but the girl is always in the room

even when Adele and Winehouse stand up in their voices

and knock us on our asses

somewhere in there Dusty is the measure they attain...

happy to have been alive while she was...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Sunday, March 3, 2013


it's never as you imagine it to be

you think there's smooth sailing or

nothing at find out (surprise surprise)

shades from your past gather

to welcome you over

or an absolute darkness subsuming you

as consciousness disappears...

maybe you treated people like shit

because you didn't believe there was anything

afterward and now find a reckoning so heavy

you'll wish there was an absolute death

or you expected a hellfire so absolute

and you thought you'd be roasting for an eternity

the smell of your rotted burning flesh

forever in your spirit nostrils

(how inventive people can be when they

put their minds to torture...others or themselves

no matter...) regardless of what judgment

you think awaits you...never doubt

you're not that big and the size of the reckoning

will be proportional and appropriate...

there'a a reason for the saying "Let God keep the books..."

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


I thought I was done

I was not done

I thought I gained my goal

my goal turned to lead in my hands

I thought I would turn aside and bless the trees

I saw the leaves curl and brown as they fell

I thought I'd stand still and not move for a while

and that's where I stand as a dark shadow advances...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


how easy to read a holy book

or someone's commentary

on a text explicated over and over

for generations

each era's voice claiming

a staunch authenticity and authority

as if the cosmos could be made definitive

to mere mortal understanding

how different to be stumbling outside the gates

with a voice crying woe for being misled

by one grand misunderstanding

of a cobbled-together phrase given divine provenance

while in the cold night's moon the howls

of wolves teach a truer reality...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

say God is Truth

and we must love

and forgive ourselves

being varied jagged pieces

but if I tell the truth

about those pieces

and the fractured Oneness

we all claim for ourselves

and am just another

shard of some infinitely broken thing

then why bother the saying

of what vague ambiguous truth

and of what holy sutures

hold this vast head together?

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


it will take no time

to finish up

the things I must do

to settle my affairs

but it is taking

all my time

to work up the bother

to do it

because these are

earthly things

and really don't matter

to eternity

the value is other's benefit

the responsibility for it is mine going forward...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


Now you see for your own self
And still cannot believe

The less your love tends to reach out
The more there's cause to grieve

Do not hoard this precious stuff
Or it will turn rancid in your keep

Disregard your disbelief
Or watch love spill down cold and steep

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.

Friday, March 1, 2013


The bird’s wing adheres
To the vectors of grace that
Conduct its lone flight

Content (c) 200802013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


my longing is fresh

as that first touch of a breast

and the stomach spinning in the gut

and high-headedness

beyond drugs and dislocation

that juvenile weakness of the knees

like childish first love

my love how do you take me back so?

me old and tired and so done with it

yet sometimes you'll make a liar of me

and I'll tumble like a young fool

not too much different than an old one

but for all the mileage and the heartbreak and yet

there we are...fools for love...and glad of it...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.


it may not go further than this posting

this need to reach you all with my dismay

and find common ground with others

who feel like I do...but who knows who knows

I send out these words who but God and who receives them

knows the worth of it?

we may all be One and find fellowship there

but how lonely sometimes to be each individual one...

Content (c) 2008-2013 Philip Milito. All rights reserved.