Friday, July 2, 2010



I visit
Headstone after
In my memory--

Leave lillies
Of regret--

Cross myself from habit

And hope they are doing
Better than I am


Tense beneath my brave face
Hard done by and sore from it
I struggle
With belittled hubris

Prodded by fear
As the only guidance available
Persistent as consequence and
Hard as forgiving one's self


Oh poor victimized
Clans of crap
Rise up and kill
Your true oppressors--

Commit suicide


To question at all God's Will
Means an instant fall from Grace--
Who knows their own hope purely--


Is this the glory in suffering?

To be first up in heaven
For a swig of Living Water
Who on earth was
Last in line with a broken cup?


Done down again
And yet again and
God Goddess Whoever Almighty--
You never tire--
Grace getting far less of a workout--
How about surprising the hell out of us
And letting goodness manifest as something more
Than a broken ideal?

Would creation truly collapse
From a brief flash of mercy?

Grant surcease please!

I weary of the mournful cuckoo
Building a nest from remorse--
Am I too unworthy to ask for the dove--
With head aflame atop blinding wings?

Would goodness build it a nest
I for one'd Promise not to try to kill it--


With only regret
To guide me
I move ahead
Fearful of
The sweetness of
Divine promise--
Fearful the promises
Will be fulfilled--

What would I do then--
Ready for anything but
The Grace
I despaired
Of receiving?


Grace may abound
When most we've fallen--
--But our fall is so swift
And Grace so slow


One tries-
Enduring love
That often
Feels as if
One were being
Tortured by
An enemy


The pride of the meek
Will undo each promise--

The hubris of suffering
Squandering our inheritance


God will stem evil
In God's good time
--Sadly we suffer
Under a different clock


I must forget Time
--whatever aspects signal Change is slow
As the ignorant that misses it
And passes off The loss of this chance
As a test of patience


Useless to denounce the world--

Horror from good intentions at cross-purposes
As hard as evil seeking
Its disruptive advantage--

Unless you're into confession--don't bother--

Any who hear will be offended--
Will say--"Who are you to say?"
When God has the last word anyway--


May I find
My strength of patience
Against hatred of world
That binds me to world--

Trying to find the Way
Where signs are scarce

[End of PART VIII.]

Content (c) 2008-2010 Philip Milito.

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