Thursday, April 26, 2012
THE GHOST'S LAST WORDS
I'm glad I'm dead
no more putting up
with the ignorant bullshit of my kind in the earth
the fawning sideshows of hubris and greed
and mean murderous pride
the One decided this was the way to go
learning through conflict
endless pain and no relief
I spurn this rotten brotherhood of sin
I'm glad I'm dead
I've found my brotherhood my sisterhood
quiet at the bottoms of their graves-hood...
I never could tell you all
where you're at
I hate no love for people
no love for myself
and every time I was stupid enough to try to love
the One itself shot me down
if there's grace it didn't seem to be for me
I believed in fairy-tales
and now suffer accordingly
in this limbo between heaven and earth
I wade through the Bardos
the unrepentant ones
chained to their hungers
eternally drunken pig-fucking crackers
getting lap-dances from hot red female demons
moving their tails aside
for a thrust of spirit cock
while the Great White Fathers stand as stiffly as in earthly life
disapproving and judging when they sweat out
the same hungers
and where every light in the distance
is an optical illusion
I might as well have kept on living
if I had to endure this
oh the lingering illusion
the false hope of a Loving Father
tying me to another stake
driven into the mud of a grave
release at last?
not so good
to what will I be released
and to what will I be delivered?
another round of pain in the earth
and what remains of my love
a torment? a lesson? a payback for my own pride?
oh peace beyond understanding...
you surround the outsides of this domain
how does one finally arrive at that?
how does the light get in?
repent? on whose terms?
who decides what every whit is?
the One who weeps for us
as we stumble in this underground?
where is the mercy? the Love?
the phantom forgiveness?
before I died I got it!
but it made no difference
you're told to repent
but are damned for repenting
anything you do is wrong
only the One calls that shot
and a piece of the One you may be
but you are not the One entire...it's not your say...
wherever one goes when all on every level is here and now
I'm on my way along the Way
you may now follow your own paths
through this unloving darkness
I cannot return (quite yet)
to tell you what I'll see
what I see will be for me only
each of us has his own vision of the Great Metempiric
and his own way through
life or death either of which is on you
maybe I'll see you on God's Golden shore
or maybe we'll meet again in misery like before
time was called and our time was up
wherever we end is all One
even in perdition
even in salvation
now even the words are beginning
to die away
I go...and you go too...
Content (c) 2008-2012 Philip Milito.