restive through an empty day

I titivate like a fly


wet leaves carpet the sidewalk

I pace pass my window to see


a carpet of brown leaves

undoing the summer's hope


I open a letter that has come

to tell me you've gone









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

wearier than when I started

the full stop pleases


and a daydream deep as a nightmare

flutters under the eyelids










Content (c) 2088-2015 Philip Milito.

so what when the skies open...


we've been dry for months

and autumn leaves are going

directly to brown


rain glazes the buildings

rivers rampage down  to the

sewer grates and people hide their heads


refreshed a moment under the torrent










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

pompous gasbag


let him construct worlds

his body will never traverse


if he told authentic truth

he'd disappear in flames


let him hide in the darkest part

of the darkest part of God he choose


his own breath would erase the plain











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I hid between the rays of light

that were false dawn during the night


and when day came I was deposed

the curtains of aether disappeared


and there in my boxer shorts exposed

I threatened the morning glow as it neared


but gave it no fright...being hard too mean business

when your shortcomings announce (quietly) the holy stress....











Content (c0 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

same reality


just viewed down the line

it preserved in its concrete and dust

the observing eye checking the flaws

with dwindling strength


oh but you will strive

and you will find a gradient that can give


rest along a busy road to remember who you are









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I know I anger easily

I'm weaker than I thought

I find it hard to forgive

I find it hard to admit


but in easier moments

I can let temporary madness go

an outburst of frustration

crowned with a need to lay prostate


and how I wake up depends on all

that is beyond my control

and acceptance is the hardest thing

harder than confessing the thorn in the soul


for us who anger easy there is yet

a channeling for the red waves of anger

to announce the Word no one needs to hear again

as if something new were brought forth


and a way to watch it eddy out

and find its place in the elements

these are things we leave behind

things ever attendant despite the talisman








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THAT PERFECT MASK

I was busy musing over

your face

that perfect mask

clandestine at heart


while a yokel is presented

before the latest committee

for approval as a token

a plaster on culture's corns


I was subsumed in how

you flow through this like an eel

but then I remembered how easy it is

to forget where you came from


so you learned what you needed

to bring down every last man

but sooooo gently and sooooo concerned

and your tally mounts as you lathe the web fine


out of some dull-witted non-second

I remembered and marked on that face

that never understood it was a little late

for gestures better suited to some plea for excuse


that face that manifested all sky above earth below

as a last comfort to me who await an embrace

from her to close everything that has contact

with this messenger traveling out in plain sight


all these revolutions of soul read in your face

as if I Breton awaited Nadja restless as a rodent in a trap

in this Dore shaded images of the unreality beneath reality

the foundation the crumbling of dirt of our passing


in this Light








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

a prayer for those who raged in the west

a prayer for those who proclaimed a square inch of legacy

a prayer for the reflections of leader's character

a prayer for the various delusions of man

a prayer for the ending of the Quest

a prayer for the beginning of the next sorrow

a prayer for the eternal in all its forms

a prayer for a joining and peace and melding









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the vein is finally tapped

exhaustion

empty sense of accomplishment

body quivering in a breeze

like the flung arrow

nailing the distended

sense of self

and then coming to rest


this way is closed

the thin pull of the

opposite direction

closes it behind us

as we repent our imaginations

as expiation for our expended quests









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.  

if I were where I ought to be

what else of myself would


I have lost in getting there and have this

to anticipate others in their graces...


that we would steam and rebel

be too damaged to be reassembled now...


but more likely a safe bet among old people

sitting watching dots on a far horizon...


and the dots looking back and imagining the shore

where I ought to be...or am....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

NO GETTING AROUND IT

don't call me friend


I'll turn and run

faster than

I've ever run in my life


because I know my fate

and you seem too

uncomfortably familiar


and I'd rather put off

a reckoning until I know

I'm strong enough


to withstand it

and if I wind up involved

it will just remind me my will


isn't superior to those of the Fates











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

OUR OWN DEFINITIONS

we are criminals

by our own definitions


but each of us thinks

we're our own best lawyer


but lawyers judges cops priests doctors

they're all criminals for breaking the codes


of their professions with their own power madness

and all anyone can say is "what can be done?"


downing themselves as well in copious

sins of omission...


oh yes no one wants to hear it...

"who are you to say anything?"


well...I'm telling it like it is

and it must be true to rankle you so....










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

HALLA-FOOL-YA

beyond my control is all I've strived for


like Tantalus I groped for what

was just beyond reach (worse...what would


lift itself out of my reach as I stretched)

I must re-read this Greek myth and seek a parallel


this is the way the Ancients described the Fates

as their successors the Jews the Christians the Muslims


the Zoroastrians the Gnostics projected their psyches

onto the skies and filled the Void with their vanity


their fear their ignorance and their pride

as the world remained ever a hell


so here in the lower ring of fire my voice rises

a cacophony of bewilderment while I search for the spigot


of Living Water that dwindles and disappears when I approach








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

you are not supposed to reach enlightenment here

you are not supposed to reunited with God in a happily ever after


you are here to eat shit and develop a taste for it

you are here to oppress others with your holiness


and if you weaken just a little bit you may taste

a snatch of what you crave and have a setback


but once all consequence is passed you'll be your old self

and go on murdering in the name of your idea of god










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

help is no help at all


there

you've learned your first lesson

in Fellowship 101












Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I'd hang you with your tongue

you blasphemous ape


if I knew it would wipe out

all the evil in the world


but blasphemy is a sure sign

of belief and you...you ape...


are just suffering like the rest of us...

only in a cruder vein








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

worldly enough to know the score

but idealistic to gamble recklessly


risk-adverse I am not

but graceful losing is another thing











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

why say you love me

when love can be

more treacherous than evil?


how much faith

can be expended

to settle qualms


when the beloved

is stubborn about who

did what to whom?


maybe you've had an easier time

of it in this brothel of the world

but as an innocent ignorant john


I have little to defend myself with except

admission to joining the ranks who have played the fool










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

every slap of the face

is supposed to contain a caress


love has made me black and blue

and crimson with shame besides










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

lie staring upward

and when the eyes adjust

watch the star of

your longing burn out

this night is ever night

while we imagine day

whose light hides the stars

but they all burn out someday

Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

TRIP WIRES

the point's driven home

like a nail in my skin


I own my error

I admit my mistakes


who are you to judge me?

your vanity not pierced yet?


you who've kicked over

your own trip wires so thoughtlessly?










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

CRIMSON MOON

crimson moon

eclipse flush in the sky

what changes do your

silent ascent in the eastern sky 

stir in the air 

and left over our lives

tired of nothing but the moment before

the earth's shadow began to transfigure you?

Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

UNTIL MORNING

sleep now


that morning comes

more quickly than


your dreams could measure












Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

HERE'S HOW

death calls

but doesn't

find you home


you went out

to be the life

of the bar tonight


good timing

good health











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WHISPER TO YOU SILENTLY

I meant well

but that's not enough


you have to lose everything you are

(including your own self)


and not think or obsess about it

with the discarded identity


who you really are

will whisper to you silently










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

BUT JUDGE...I SAW NOTHING

live with your fellow humans

long enough and you run the risk

of being charged with murder


(for my part it's justifiable homicide)

because nothing will drive you crazier

than your own faults reflected in another


and you think they're too stupid to get it...

well...what the hell are you doing now?











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

GIANT

I saw a giant shadow glide

over the streets and buildings

this morning


it wasn't a cloud

and it wasn't some airplane

and the morning news reported nothing


but I saw several people on the street

fidgeting wildly and talking in tongues












Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

HEARTS TO MOURN

I'd confess freely all I've done

to ruin a salvation

or (worse) violate a love


but there aren't enough

words or time to do so

and any who take these words


have equally enough on their own minds

or in their hearts to mourn









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito

INEXORABLE KARMA

mess made

damage earned

price paid

lesson learned


but was the wisdom

therein gained?

yet a life to come

will show what's retained








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SLEEP

unable to weep


the eyes have run dry

and the heart has ceased to tremble


when done is done and enough is enough

it becomes easy to let go


and as is has replaced the need to know why

soothing the jittery mind as will crumbles


ready and more than willing to sleep








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

PASSING

a passing thought on this and that

reminds you how quickly a lifetime can pass


each of us stunned at how slow life trudges along

and how fast in hindsight were the long years in going


a fleeting glimpse of a happening now just memory

reminds of the futility in wishing to repair


an unfixable past or fret a future that has yet to arrive

the passing thought past and the next thought here...right now....







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

DAILY PONDER

how will I contradict myself today?


think a closure is an opening when it's not?

think a closure is an opening when it is?

think vise versa unable to tell which is which?


think love conquers all?

think a broken love can be mended?

think of all the right going wrong and wrong


going right as I think I can reconcile myself?









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

LAYERS OF AWARENESS

awake to my full potential


I'm paralyzed by the empty

prospects of a single possibility


thought still groggy from the dream

from which thought has emerged


and so not fully awake at all

but mind striving upward and out of


its darkness on the verge of waking







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

LEFT TO BARGAIN WITH....

we have little left to bargain with...


the sky the earth

the horizons where they embrace


they are full over our grasping fingers

while we are depleted


clinging to the ground

a small part of the total vision


but conspicuous by being a niggling detail...

all we have got left to bargain with....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

ANIMALS ARE HAPPIER THAN WE ARE BECAUSE OF THE CONTENTS OF THIS POST...THEY DON'T...

if I were you I wouldn't sweat these things of life


yes I do it because I have an active mind

that finds it hard to rest and can't believe


some of the shit that is going on in this creation

but I know when to let the exhausted mind go


and settle back into a chair and stimulant in hand

laugh at my own and everyone else's foolishness


eventually it all comes down to the last sight of the bottom

of a beer bottle and sentimental tripe about a love


that forgot you long about and choose another life

and is now like you facing the consequences of that choice


christ how many times have I told you?

yes we must get right with our Maker


but not consciously or we'll only screw things up again









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WHERE THE HELL ARE WE?

we look in the mirror and say "God"


well...yes...and no....

to know you are a (fractured) part of the whole

and think that makes you the whole


is the fatal mistake that all searchers encounter

your part is important...significant...in all its limited

glory but the part draws its strength from the whole


which it will never comprehend as long as it looks


in a mirror and says "God"








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

STUPID HUNTER

I'd busted through the hedges

and took a little snatch

but then I got infected

by a nasty little scratch


and now when I see pussy

gliding through the grass

I hide until the lioness and cubs

ramble lazily and pass












Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

HOW WE FAIL

those who will not or cannot

forgive themselves

cast themselves to the grinding fates

and call it God's vengeance









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

NYC 5:03 AM

I'd sleep but for worry

I'd laugh but for cares

I'd step but to hurry

I'd try but for dares


too much with which to grapple

in every ravening day

I find harms in supply ample

enough to hold rest at bay









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

LITTLE GOODNESS

deluded by everything

including the realization of delusion


some talk to themselves

and call it prayer


and while the weight of guilt

adds to every confusion


the unavoidable shock of fact

neutralizes all consciousness where


all vanity wilts in its own reflection

because there is little goodness there








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

IT'S THE INSOMNIA TALKING

my head can stand no more of anything


I guess the soul does have a saturation point


and wringing it out needs more strength


than my wrists can manage










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THINK OF ALL WHO'LL READ THIS IN THE FUTURE AND THINK EITHER WHAT THE FUCK OR HEAR THEIR OWN VERSION

too loud

too loud

my head's too loud

I can't hear the rustles of leaves

nor the soft ribbons of brooks


I live in a city

that is being destroyed by greed

and the jabber of jerks

who think this is fine

is as loud

as the destruction/construction


too loud

but tragically

allowed






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE HUM

a cacophony of souls crying


because they lost their way


when they've found their way


they'll hear nothing


but the hum of their being








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

ONE NOTE 3

what was that?


it seemed familiar

maybe I'm confusing it


with something else I heard

made by someone else


who was me as I am him









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

ONE NOTE 2

the sound echoes back


who hears it

through the mountains of their minds?


I'll never know in this life

or maybe in any other life


I only recognize it because I made it







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito,

ONE NOTE

I play only one note

on my flute


but I bend it in so many ways


does it matter?


only if you're there to hear it....







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

FOR EILEEN MYLES

imaginary newspaper gossip column:


SIGHTINGS

Eileen Myles and Patti Smith gouging

on vegetable schnitzels and blintzes

at the Ukrainian East Village Restaurant....




(see

live long enough

and you will be enshrined....)








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

FATALLY CORRECTED

I thought I came to save you


what vanity


here you are doing well

and I'M the one at the end of his rope


whatever I did I did

because I thought it was the right thing


and would help


well here I am fatally corrected










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

YOU BOTHER WITH IT

act and be defied

stay still and receive everything


life's not a joke

it's a koan








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

DRIFTING INTO SLEEP

how I wish I lay safely drifting into sleep

with a father's good night blessing

uttered over closing eyes

and untroubled dreams after

that reconstructed the glorious day


we all were this child once

and only the slight tears of memory welling

bless where this life's road started











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

YOUR NEXT MOVE

eclipses and nodes and transits and retrogrades


scoff at your own peril

there's a reason why the only control you have


in life is over your next move

and the outcomes are not your business


and all this cosmic activity invisibly scours

everything you failed to do right in setting your choice


in motion and what is that but just your own try at wisdom?









Content (c) 2008-02015 Philip Milito.

OUR WORSE

our Oneness in God is our blessing

our Oneness in God is also our curse


our Oneness makes us share our testing

as our Oneness reduces us to our worse


it's beyond figuring and we sin if we try

all this consideration that tears like a wolf tooth


and leaves us nonplussed and in anguished cry

as if we ever did know what exactly is the truth....










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WEE WEE WEE

common the ailments

common the complaints


this is our condition

this is the lot we've drawn


stop whining like a spoiled baby

when you've stubbed your toe


so many others would give anything

to have their leg back











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE MATTER

one step after another

on a dead road


all your works crumbling

all you've loved passing


as if it ever mattered

beyond the instant of its glory


and the sad brunt of our brief day is hope

that our ephemeral achievement extend past our dying







Content (c)2008-2015 Philip Milito.

TEAT

nothing works or ever did


each generation had its own illusion of infinity


you'll bust your ass in the name of some tyrant


and miss out on hind teat...at best....









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WELL THIS WON''T WORK ANYMORE

nobody knows when to laugh


only when to reach for his gun

and start blasting


and especially if he thinks

someone's laughing at him...


Luther once said "if you can't drive out

the Devil with Scripture...try laughing at him"


I think sadly we're way past that point....










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WELL WHICH IS IT...FIRE OR WATER?

how can one not be angry with the world


when 99.9% of one's fellows creatures

douse every damnable fire with kerosene?


and what of the Almighty?

is the One guzzling infinitudes of beer


to work up a huge enough piss to douse the thing?








Content 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

MILD

ah why complain?


it's Saturday night

and that means steak and corn and mashed potatoes


for dinner and Chiller Theater after that

then noctilucent clouds above the porch


in the mild end of a summer night...

it might as well be tonight for all


the vividness of the memory....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SEEMS SHEEP LOVE INFINITY

another second

in another minute

of another hour

of another day

of another week

of another month

of yet another year


and oh this over and over and over

and over and over and over and over....









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

A MOB AT THE ROADSIDE

we crowd the chicanes of the world's path


yes it's a defeat of our movement

yes it reins in our will to exceed


and well it should

you clowns of speed and disrespect


you know "first one now

will later be last?"


I'm for anything that defeats your pride













Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

FORGOTTEN

you stand under a crisp blue sky

and again start positing ideas of infinity


but the sun blinds you for a moment

and as you look away with your thoughts forgotten


there you are again

perfect under a crisp blue sky











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

YET ANOTHER PARADOX

trust and satisfaction

are hard come by these days


maybe they always were


but to finally come to a place in mind

where you really need neither


now that's rare indeed


how easy to embrace the whole universe

when you believe in nothing









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I DON'T MIND A BIT

I don't mind a bit

if I wind up dying of you


I'll be released from the earth

and you will die one day


with my blood on your hands...


how's that for a win-win scenario?










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

CONGRATULATIONS ON NOTHING

somewhere you're breaking another heart

and you have the law on your side


but what looks outside so golden and smart

is just another pile of shit inside








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SUSTENANCE

your name will be called


but all you'll hear is a shrieking of birds

or a low feline rumbling

or a serpentine hissing

from beneath a fern


and the city you thought

some earthly paradise

will revert to its basic elements

and marmots will lose your luggage


and your meeting will be a gathering

of pigs around a trough

munching and slurping and smacking

the next piglet to be sacrificed for the lions on top


oh these cliches are as trite as they are true

and since no one gets it

another prey falls to a predator

while some insects camouflage themselves


to look like the sticks of furniture they occupy

and either you'll live to squeal the tale or no longer be

anything for any purpose but somehow some way at some time

your name will be called like the belch of an alpha asshole


and you won't even have time to think "what was that?"







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SIMPLETON

oh how I wish I was the simpleton I was


I knew nothing and thought nothing of it


and I probably acted more freely and proper


than the egomaniac who replaced him


but all of us pay some kind of price


and my arrogance is all spent


we all dig into our loose pockets for change


and hope the god will take an i.o.u.








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I GUESS IT'S MERCY...WHAT DO YOU THINK?

you know I could get used to this...


sitting here like some dizzy dope

and not even notice the weights of karma


sending a dish of the scale down

to crush my nodding head...


like those who do not believe in continuance

dying into nothingness because that's what they expected...


in even this judgment the One is merciful....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

OH SUCK ME!

I went through all the shit in my life

to wind up like this?


old...sad...with fading memories

oozing out of the wreckage I ramble in?


oh...excuse me...this is the human condition...

we all go through this


and here I am crabby waiting for my peers

to make it to our last BBQ










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I know so few

want to hear what I bring


but am I just following a compulsion

to fill some emptiness


or is there a reason for all this oratory?


heh...I'm posing a question to any of you

that the Oneself Itself won't even answer


do what I do...have a drug of choice and stare at the sunset....







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I left my crap on a roadside


took only the needed essentials


and they'll be side aside also


when I get where I'm going


see you there or not


all the tangle of roads that vary


get in all our ways even as they


lead us where we will be







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I have no drug to ease this passing


no happy memory untainted by reality


I paid my price and I've done my time


and lie in the afternoon sun


waiting for this instant to be done







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

LOVERS WHEN LOVE DOESN'T CONQUER ALL

you thought you found a genius

but he wasn't one


and soon all his profound pronouncements

sounded like the trash-talk of a bum


but he thought he had a devoted slave

ans spun his words more wildly


and stopped dismayed the day he realized

that she would no longer hear him







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

DELIVERANCE (WITHOUT BANJOS AND SQUEALING)

I'M TURNING OVER A NEW LEAF

I'M GOING TO BECOME A MASTER OF RIGHTEOUS CLICHES

I'M GOING TO LOVE MY FELLOW HUMANS

AS I LOVE MYSELF

AND "DER GOTT" WITH MY WHOLE BEING

I'M GOING TO DO RIGHT AND SIT IN FAITH

THAT MY PRAYER WILL BE ANSWERED

AND I WILL CEASE TO BE THIS CREATURE THAT I AM


eh?...why are you all laughing at me?











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE BEGINNINGS OF WISDOM

why is it

that even after

you've overcome

some great adversity

or bested some enemy

after you for hate's sake alone


why is it there's still no peace

and no sense of anything being rectified?










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

BAGGAGE AND AFTERWARD

everything I ever claimed to want so badly

I refuse and leave in a heap on some roadside...


my whole lifetime of "stupidest mistakes"

crushing me with some recent one probably being


the fatal blow that is making me malinger in remorse

rather than outright die...


oh I could say it was this love or that

the devoted mate losing to the wild faithless lover...


or maybe hate for those who squandered chances I'd've killed for...

or a betrayed trust that led to


a tiny twinge of greed that made me try to out-wheedle

some equally unscrupulous partner...


any of these from this litany of common sins

could've done the most harm... even when recognized


any attempt at amendment did no real good after all...

these taught only the emptiness of a clinging to our lower minds


and aspirations unappeasable to souls that wanted some higher ground

and somehow lost the way in trying to find it...


I can't say I'm lonely...everyone else's unwanted baggage

looks the same as mine on this roadside...each of us searching


for our paths...going forward to find the place where we'll pass over...

chastened and these particular ways done....







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE WISE FOOL

well the fool I am

knows more

than the wise man

who pretended to knowledge

beyond his ken


the more I know

the less I understand


I must have had a breakthrough

serves me right


while every stupid move casually

kicked over every karmic tripwire

and here I am knowing only

that I know nothing


unsurpassed as the wise fool






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WE

everywhere I go

I run into myself


different names

and different faces


genders and attitudes

strengths and weaknesses


but it's me all right

and each of me thinks


the same of themselves

ever the question in the earth


we're all One

but which One?


and that is why wherever we go

there we are







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

RETURNS

all departures are returns


this you will remember

when you arrive








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

BLANK

a blank page

says it all







Content(c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SHADE

I have no heart

since I lost yours


did our time

matter at all?


all memory hurts

with regret


and how long before

death extends its shade?






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

FUTILITY

I race a clock

that's running fast









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

MY PAST A STORY

my days are gone

my past a story

upon which Baron

Munchausen couldn't improve


but what do truth and falsity

matter...both are real

because both exist

I cannot vouch for your


honesty but nor will I

call you a liar

and all afterward

isn't our business anyway









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SALUTATIONS OF SORTS

shalom and aloha

both mean goodbye and hello


how appropriate since none of us

know whether we're coming or going








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

52 WEEKS ISN'T A LONG TIME

earlier nightfalls

and leaves growing russet and yellow


autumn already

that days ago were the first hot summer days








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

HAPPIER

I believe in a continuance of consciousness

beyond this worldly sojourn


but I know as little (maybe even less)

than others of my persuasion


about such things

either the Light leads ever onward or


it's last call lights outs that's all brother

either way I can only wish the life I had was happier










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

BLUNT CLUB

no mercy for you

when you weaken and fall


enjoy your strength

while you can savage another


when you're tired

and past prime


your last word will be silent

as some blunt club ends your light








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WHO NEEDS A DEVIL WHEN YOUR NEIGHBOR WILL DO?

I searched for some escape route

but found none because there's nowhere else be here


so I lie down and close my eyes

and hope when they get me I won't feel too sharply


the breaking of my bones

at the pounding of their clubs and ax handles


these 'good decent' citizens who'll run you to ground

if you don't undergo their lobotomy








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

BREAKING MY OWN HEART?

why am I breaking my own heart?


I already love my fellow creatures

(albeit with the proverbial pinch of salt)


and I let go the ones too far gone for help

they must straighten themselves and can't)


but to try to be more than I can be

for the sake of some unforgiving maniac


threatening my death if I don't get in line...

no...that's where we part company and I find out


for myself if my own goodness is worth

all that others put on it...if that's so


then I've truly failed miserably...


better to be for myself...it's the only way

I can be there for others...or doesn't God understand?








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WE WERE WARNED OF THIS TIME OF MADNESS IN THE EARTH

I have no strength any longer

to challenge the rogues of religion


ISIS and the Jewish fundamentalists

are bad enough but our american home-grown


terrorists twist every word of scripture to fit

their unstoppable insanity


(and I DO mean that bumpkin clerk refusing

to issue marriage licenses to gay lovers


(four times divorced may I add?

or does that make her more of a heroine to the idiots?)


and her great supporter Mike Huckleberry Hound)

how easy in their ignorance to spin Romans 13:1-7


(I won't even go far enough to point out how spurious

these passages may be if they are not an interpolation


from Pauline ideas that refute this section of Romans)*

see? you need a brain and more...a conscience...


to examine this stuff...let alone take it seriously...

the most basic code to live by is do unto others


as you'd have them do unto you...God Almighty...

does this still have to be said this late in the game?


are all of you still so dim and locked into yourselves

that you don't get it?


jump up and down and have a beer or more...

I suffer from a lack of peers


and frankly getting out now is the holiest thing

I can imagine...let the evil rule and let God glance away...


we may all in our way wreck and ruin the world

but nothing fixes the harm...


not even this so-called god to whom

all things are possible...yeah...right....




*If it's worth your time to you, check bible.org to see what they have to say on the matter. If the holy interpreters don't know for sure, why should ignorant us bear the onus? I see the sin and hate in the world, and I wonder what this alleged god is thinking.





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THROUGH

god may save and god may not

god does all but takes no blame


and so no matter what you do

the whole damn thing is strictly on you


don't cling too tightly to what you've got

you'll hold on but lose it all just the same


no evil's worth pain and no good rings true

live as best as you know and see what you get


when this life is through







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SWIMMING

we're all sinking in this overcrowded dinghy

bucketful after bucketful of water goes over the side

but fast as we bail the water rises

and there we go swimming for that illusive shore


and if we make that heavenly shore

what wonders we will see

and if we don't what wonders we will see

that draw us to their brief domain before we drown








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE ONLY PROBLEM

the only problem for those who believe in death

is that walking around in their slowly rotting skins

they're already more than half gone...


it's the consciousness that looks through their eyes

that will carry the load of their particular lives

and even then they'll confuse the earthly me


with the eternal I and continue their journey

just missing the transcendence they can hardly imagine







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WE HAVE OUR TIME

well it's been a blast

(at least it was when we were

in our full strength)


but we've had our time

and the content of our being

is filled with loves and determination


how sad to be old grandpa

resenting and blessing

those now fully in their prime


and yet how glad to be done with it

the desire always hotter than the outcome

my shoulder's tapped and I surrender my seat


to some young buck who'll wind up like me

I hope he knows all he'll get is good and more than enough










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE EARTH IN NEW IDENTITIES

we look for our completion


and that's where we fail


none of it is directly any of our business


what we do will come back on us


and none of us can say


who we will be the next time


we tread the earth in new identities


and face the same matters we failed to handle this time











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

DISGUISES

life is forever

we know it in our souls


it's just that we think

this forever is going to be about


our identities in this particular time

in the earth


when you are no longer me

will you recognize yourself as I?








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philp Milito.

I left little messages for you

and you didn't pick up on any one of them


don't say I didn't try to get to you

say rather you didn't care after all


and what else you picked up on will be

what you will have to explain


none of us is wholly guilt or wholly innocent

pride will be our leveling








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

HOT SEPTEMBER STREET

this hot early September street

must be like the afterlife we await


souls stumbling ragged in the

unforgiving heat


and every shade an invitation

to rest in yet another past moment


making you regret what you did

to wind up this way







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

AT THE CIRCUS

after a lifetime

at the circus


I finally found

the exit


and left the flap

of the tent


fluttering like a hurricane

just blew through








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

ILLUMINATED

be in the instant of your living

be act do live love

exactly as you will


because even God is disgusting beyond measure

and all who love and wish to amend

are destroyed utterly by this god


make no mistake

I AM THAT I AM

means THING ARE AS THEY ARE


and you as a mere creature in this chaos

have nothing to say about it

so love and do as you will as they used to say


(you have no control over the outcome)

and let this disgusting Tyrant do as it will

and if this Tyrant is so precise beyond anything


we could call honesty or trustworthiness

then you'll walk forever in the All

and if not well even then who knows


what will be? nothingness? ultimate death?

most expect this already and handle it

with greater grace than the ninnies who cling to consciousness


forgetting 'he who would save his life must lose it'

if God is not this mad psychopath demanding more

than we can give then don't even think of that either


lest you start imposing your ignorant frightened self

and continuing your clinging to your doom

yes here is the simplest release from your anguish


the very thing God Itself will stand back

to let you choke in by yourself

just try to forget God altogether don't praise don't blame


just live as rightly as you know how

and let everyone including God play their power games

ignore it all and live in the instant and let everyone else


go to the hells in which they belong...no need for you to go with them....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

RELEASE

I no longer know happiness

but I do know peace


or at least stillness

(or is it numbness?)


as I fade the Void does increase

and I grow calmer as my aches decrease


I can scarce imagine when consciousness

will make all this sweet agony cease








Content(c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WHOLLY WHOLLY HOLY

juckin' fesus

what the hell's going on?


the more you try to do good

the more you're shat upon


polish your fool vanity

take in vain God's Name to praise it


but if this cold vengeance of God is all there is

then who the fuck needs it?









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito

LEARN TO UNLEARN

those who wake up to Reality

lose all joy in living

they see for themselves

the heartless grinding processes

of creation and just how the All

is worked through it all


but all that's really lost

is our mistaken notions of what life actually is


be like a Buddha and be unaffected

by the tenuous unreal universes and more


detach and you will still find ways

to meditate and show compassion


be yourself and you will still be creative and at peace

detach because illusion is real and it kills









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WHEREVER

wherever I go

I find myself already there


did I miss myself

in my rush?







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

EXACTLY

always in step

but never in line


perfection is so evanescent

it might seemingly not be at all


yet we hold the only course we know

daunted by every unchangeable mistake


perfection seems so self-defeating

yet that is exactly why the One demands it of us








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

LOVE IS THE ANTIDOTE...BUT...

love is the antidote

to the evil (as such) of Cosmic Disharmony


but love can be as hard as evil

when we try to amend our way


back to the One's essential Harmony


talk about the cure that kills

we pay so hard for every misstep

and are returned so little for any amendments







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

FROM PHILEMON

oh my sweet Baucis

loosen your neck

and don't feel

your own passion a betrayal


our love tied many desires

together in a good mix

until there was a stumbling

that made us doubt our choices


I own my fault

and you will face your share in due time

but no matter where we wind up

in this earth you will know


we will wind up entwined

in an eternal grove somewhere








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

IN THIS TOGETHER

until such time as I'm called forth

to crossover from this sojourn


I will love and desire every woman and thing

that makes my pitiful heart burn


I do not wish to make too much

of every twitch that compels me


but whatever I've fixed and whatever I've ruined in my soul

I've had joyous help all around me








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

VISION OF HEAVEN

so my vision of heaven

will be the last thing on earth I see


and the reality after earthly release

the first thing that will shame my imagination








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I'D LAUGH

I'd laugh at life's absurdity

if it didn't hurt so much






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THEIR OWN BUBBLES

people do not understand

anything outside their own bubbles


odd since none of us is any different

than the other except for each's overblown sense of self








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WHITE NIGHT

laying back down to bed

I'm a little calmer

I'm less restive


but my eyes won't close









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

UNLUCKY

unlucky the lover

who cannot tell


it was his pride

that dismissed his love









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

IN THE FALSE DAWN

in the false dawn


the lights of a plane

draw me away for a moment


from my unrestful mind


it has taken

my consciousness with it


as it disappears

into the distance








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

APOLOGIES UNNECESSARY

all the "I'm sorry"s

plowed into a huge pile


don't really matter

after the damage is done










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

STRIVING

you strive


Buddha tells us

to strive ceaselessly


sounds

counter-intuitive doesn't it?


does empty heart know to grieve?

does blank mind know its blank?


you strive to not strive







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I DO NOT

death waits

like a rat

crouching cornered

ready to strike


let it

I do not fear the rat

and I do not

fear death









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito

steamy night

stress and thoughts

keep me at this screen

typing this out

3:10 am







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

3 AM

3 am in new york city

half moon high

you sleep

turned away from me









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

AUTUMN

hazy night

early September


summer's last flaring

before autumn chill


all of life past

all of life gone


and memory

long as infinity







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

PLAGUE THE TAIL

my love is tired

exhausted by its time

running out like salt

from a torn sack


but it is my love

and wherever it goes

it will plague the tail

of some other bird


and those who've shared

this time with me

may they wind up in better shape

than in what I've come to be


tired but as ready as I can be

to be what I am






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

PART OF THE PROCESS

call upon the wheeling galaxies

and their pulsating stars to witness your tragedy


though you are too small to be seen

your agony's part of the process


but to be anointed and raised

forgiven and saved...if I were you


I'd be glad enough to take refuge in my smallness

no matter how vast the Whole I'm a part of....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE ONE'S TRIUMPH

for the Ineffable One


our suffering is the One's happiness


why?

how should I know?

I'm no different than anyone else

I broke my own heart trying to set things right


but for the Ineffable One


our failure is the One's triumph








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I TRIED

I tried


I really really tried


but God would not forgive

and no amount of repentance

would change the miserable fate

of one who awoke to his fate


God is not love


we are love and love is weak and useless






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SHOULD HAVE KNOWN

I should have known

repentance doesn't work


consequence cannot be neutralized

by a change of heart


and those who think so

don't realize how safe and soft they have it


I should have known

not to listen to a satisfied man








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

NIBBLE NIBBLE

what has the shit-eating fly to do

in some Great Cosmic Plan?


for that matter what do we humans have

to say about our failures to understand?


we are mere parts of some outrageous whole

where each part thinks it's the whole


and if we could see purely this unity

could we sustain or would we all go scattered again?







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

INTO YOUR GROVE

following quickly the scented feet

swift with temptation naked and fleet


I followed you into your grove

and watched you recline on the wet stones


and in that instant I was ensnared

by the desire that led me to dare


to join you in the humid noon hot and fresh

to become as one merged flesh








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

BOTH OF US

both of us are right and wrong

struck out blindly in love


and hurt each other into a union

that healed as much as it harmed


and before the scars manufactured our myths

our pained realization of the cost


draining that wound full of pus

which is what we've done to us








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

YOU JUST NEVER KNOW

to move with caution is a must

but swiftly as well lest you lose your trust

in your ability to atone

and to face the ordeal alone


so make your step precise and brisk

because everything in life poses a risk

and even when the road is clear

there still may be some danger near








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.