we have no time left

and all time left


we know we'll be safe once

we stand outside our skins


but safe from what? mere but dangerous illusion

posited by our identities?


oh fear less than you do

with no and all time suspended


even the skins are only designs made

from the sheer fabric of Vega's weaving


we stand everywhere and nowhere

and yet here we are whether we understand or not


stay firm in mind and purge all fears

while the Universe changes around us








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

love will never die

while hate will kill all that lives


hate almost always prevails in the earth

but on rare occasion love will triumph


in some tiny happening of vast proportion

and even then how many more million years


in the earth before the hate is fully eradicated

and the love left standing singular and all-embracing as ever?









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

how we mourn the things we tried to take

when they weren't ours to have


and how we dismiss and disdain all that's ours

because we failed in our attempt at robbery


we ignore our aspirations and mock our fates

while consequence with its fatal certainty


leave us empty of will and desire which would be

wonderful if we understood how free this loss makes us







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

you can take everything from me that you want

it was never mine anyway

and you will find out for yourself that none of it

will work because it's not yours either









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

how I hate reality


it seems the very antithesis

of joy and peace and love


but what do I or anyone know

beyond our frightened aspirations?


straight out of the despair

(our own invention)


how we loathe granite fate






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

we cannot be who we were

and all seems hopeless and lost


but all could be healed if we rose

above ourselves


and changed the paradigm of our affections

but to do that requires honesty


and will we ever be strong enough

to manage that...whomever we've become?







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

there's little I could do

to ease your pain


we've both played our little tricks

and gained nothing but enmity


as what we were circles us in orbits

too far-flung to recognize


we would have to change ourselves to heal

and there's little to do about that






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

happy new year?

why?


it's just a fake measure of time

and the day after we awake


to the same world and the same time

and the same wounds we'd disinfect


and bind hoping for a healing

that is somewhat hopeful








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

love that has died

is like a planet ringed with

the dust of its destroyed moon


years decades eons from now

someone will look up

at the broken moon


and feel the tug of yearning

a thousand years long






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

loss


every moment passing is loss

but every moment also brings gain


weep no more for what's gone

your hands are empty now take the


gain






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

JOY AND ANGUISH

the joy of age

is the anguish of youth







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

such emptiness over loves that faded

like wine stains on the first-date dinner


he again at the restaurant but years later

and off his game considerably


he waits for yet another salvation

to approach in tight-dress and heels


such emptiness over loves we leave and seek

and find each one is the same person we left








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

don't know why I keep doing this


if I can barely understand myself

what value could I possibly have for others?


or am I the clown entangled in his own

payback and is condemned to play the fool


until he understands exactly what a fool signifies


wisdom in gaudy off-putting garb

wisdom in koans that reveal the need to press on?








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

selective talk

is feared by the dishonest


that's their problem

it's none of their business


anyway so clip their ears

with everything they can't


understand and watch them disappear

with the fast scamper of the 'found-out'








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

all I wanted

I have now


all I depended on

is now for the taking


what did I do for

the rusty faucet to come clean?


I left the tap on

and creation took care of the rest








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

loneliness toward the end


isolation so intense


the blood rushing through my ears


is the only music to be heard







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

longing








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

NAME YOUR SPIRITUAL POISON

well

fool that I be

I wake up

to my responsibility

to others and find

its another hoax

to keep us in line

by the evil world-lovers

who manipulate the Word

and destroy everything else

because the One will not lift a finger

to stop them and to help us

alone each of us must face this living horror

and find our own way out

whatever the One demands

if the lord won't help

then stop thinking of your vision of heaven

you may not get there

no matter what good you do

so ignore god and stop clinging to a desperate

frightened fear of eternal death

it is your own mind enslaving you

and it is the One who haunts your cell

and grins at you between the bars

you...each of us...who lived the illusion that

god was love....





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

NEVER GOOD ENOUGH

I was happy

until I woke up


the shitty Reality

of God


pressing on me

like the Warden looking away


from His guards beating the shit

out of the small and the weak


and most disgusting of all

that this is mandated


even for those who live

truly pious lives


and find its never good enough

to satisfy this...this...I have no words for this atrocity....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

GHOSTS

your ghost loves me

as much as I loved it


when it lived in my heart

as an active living entity


you left and I have yet to do so

your ghost loves me


but will it equally love my ghost?

we'll find out what we've given each other


when that time arrives....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SOLITUDE

solitude is the one thing

that can soothe a soul

in this world that knows nothing

but empty gestures and futile communication


solitude is the one gift of the heavens

that gives you any sense of eternity

within the confines of our limited skins

that ache so much for undisturbed peace







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

IT'S YESTERDAY IT'S TOMORROW

refreshed after a dream I can't remember

I rise in the morning and discover

it's yesterday it's tomorrow

it's always here and now


and yet the forgotten dream

pointed a way

beyond this entanglement

that is the grip of all matter


I only sense this

coursing through my mind

moving with my limbs

reacting to the irresistible


pull of a piece of eternity

that came to me as a dream





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

why did I bother when nothing mattered?

why did I try to be happy following

a killer god of no love or mercy or forgiveness?


why in the name of who knows what

did I go on believing in the face of all the facts

of mercy and sadness that constitute life on earth?


why did I ruin for myself all the good?

why am I even bothering to ask?






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

like the black ashes of dead starfish

our love is swept back into the waves






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

whatever end I face in this life

I will go down cursing the idiots


but still going up

honestly did You think


going against your own law

would teach us humility


to be crushed down by Your lack of forgiveness

and somehow we'd deduce humility?


oh course I despair

at finding the Source of Life


is no different or better than His creation?

oh the eternal idiocy of all of this


if creation gives us reason to fail then

I'll face whatever end I face in this sojourn


whose time has already passed?





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

screw eternity


I'm happy in this instant

and if it's nothing but


another half-view of some

imaginary eternity


it's still a happiness

oh what will the One and Its imperatives


do to disabuse that notion of hope....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

too often


we're blinded by the Light

and that Light leads us


right back into our delusions

even the One in all its aspect


does not guarantee enlightenment

as long as your sad ego obeys it's own notions


you will stay blind in the Light








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

LIGHT

the Light shines


it has never stopped shining

and it breaks through to our souls


and lights up every mistake

every miscalculation that allows us


to think we can see the Light so bright

we see only darkness and hope we can wade through


all that stands between us in that Light...good luck....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

ON YOU

why go on blaming God for my own failures

to get right

I might as well curse the sun for rising

every morning


but every morning is another chance

to screw up

or to finally hit that vein of self-mastery

that isn't an excuse


for being the raging beasts we choose to be







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WASHING HANDS

I must wash my hands


I've taken deeper responsibility

for my own life

and hygiene demands

I wash the shit off my hands


we all must wash our hands


it is on us to figure our way out of

this world this mess this pity








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SKY

sky fills the eye


the heart beats like

surges of surf


all hearing

retains the music


of bird beast and flowers

and you a transparent form


camouflaged by everything





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the end of bitterness and anger

and regret

leaves a large space

in the repentant soul


and what fills it

pours in with the

emptiness of peace

the ragged perfection


of being finished





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE WAY WE LIKE IT

dangerous

incorrigible

humanity


like

beasts

they


tear

each

other


too

much

at


home

in

the


world

so

God


may

weep




Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the idea of death

is lost on the 'dead'


they've been through

their worldly lives


they could care less

(or so I imagine)


but in that grand afterward

do they speculate on


the idea of life

that is lost on the 'living'?








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

no thought

no opinion

no hope

no need


I live

step by step

instant by instant

life after life


bewildered

every

step of

the way






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WHY BOTHER PRAYING?

why bother praying? God already has you in His sights

no easy forgiveness just constant punishment


for trying to amend and all God knows what to do

is crush you down with His vengeance


well let Him...God wants us to amend and then damns us

for not being perfect enough? oh this sickening bastard


this Life...those who will amend and suffer

while those who only know a devil's command


and will follow it with no interference from this alleged

God of Justice and Mercy...horseshit to the max...


you want to believe in One who'll shit on you

with every move you make...


but then Lord what do You care? Your plan is being fulfilled

and You're more evil than those who deserve perdition....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WORKING HARDER...FOR WHAT?

I must work harder to forgive my foes

and accept the judgment of a less-than-loving God


oh how Life sucks

every drug or piece of sex or submission to "da Lawd"


weighing on every one of our joys and all

we'd need to endure the divine heartless


I'll keep on trying but not with any promises

if God can let us hang like this then really who needs Him?








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

MY KILLERS

so here is where we gather

for our reckoning


the wildly unreasonable evil

have their way while God looks the other way


but oh He's supposed to settle our hashs

very soon (an indefinite measure of time)


and under His hand we chafe and suffer

and thank you all for your part in this


my brothers my sisters my killers








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

PLAYING AT BEING GOD

after centuries of mushroom visions


what a wake-up call to see

how the new age is really coming about


all the ignorant evil that runs wild

in the midst of God's indifference


and dies a death as common as anyone's

oh you fools you evil wicked fools


you and your enemies deserve to suffer and die

and God will accommodate you


we all suffer for playing at being God

and this in this era is the way He is making us pay


for the horrible travesties of holiness

we propagate against each other


bring back the mushrooms so much purer than God








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

YOU AND YOUR KILLER

how wonderful to live

in this time of tribulation


everything is laid out for you

you don't even have to choose your death


God the do-nothing judge of the universe

will sit and weep with you


and when you die your killer will blow himself up

and God will chastise you and your killer for failing


to bow before His absentee landlord demands









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE BOGUS WAR ON TERROR

the spirit of love

is like a booster shot


injected into the soul

to strengthen its immunity


of those who will die of

the insanity of our lesser bipeds


(yes they're assholes all

but look at the Power that lets it happen)


already we're feeling the reactions

of this injection


preparing to suffer yet again of those

we must love and forgive


not now not while this insanity is happening

do the best you can for God could care less....







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WHAT GOES AROUND ETC. ETC.

you're busting my balls on purpose aren't you


you have no scruples of your own

and think "let me mock this one"


let God give you your head

keep believing you have superior knowledge


even as people see you as the asshole you are

nothing will sty your hand from misadventure


and you'll bust your own balls as a result







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

STONE ITSELF

you won't lose a thing if you don't try


and that will wind up a burden to you

my sin was retreating when I should have moved forward


and now my feet have sunk into mud

as unyielding as stone itself


what will be the thing you love that will

anchor you to your suffering


and show you your losses beyond counting?






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

DATED UNTIL ALL WAKE UP TO REALITY

like Moses to the mountain


the hordes awaiting the Word

get tired and their faith weakens and wastes


as they orgy beneath that Golden Calf

you know how pissed off Moses could get


(he himself who doubted a moment and struck

the rock twice) it forbade him entrance to the


Promised Land and sent his people wandering

another forty years


fuck 'em! they saw divinely directed locusts

make a feast of Egyptian fields


they saw Angels of Death take first-born

pillars of fire and parted seas


and still they fucked off....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

EVERYTHING BEGUN EVENTUALLY ENDS AND STARTS AGAIN

one thing ends and a new one begins

God Almighty why?


is that what we scramble for

in attempts to convince ourselves


we have repented and been absolved?

this too is an ongoing work


no final answers until the Reunification

no despair if we've forgotten ourselves


and do what our True Selves must do

action by acquiescence


no signing the masterpiece

no glory as it endures its purpose


and who knows this better than the One

to whom we pray for our imaginary lives?





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE NIGHT THAT IS MORNING ELSEWHERE

Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I SUBMIT

I submit to the physical laws


my time dwindles

but memory is strong


soft and forgiving

as the rage that fired me


goes out and now I rejoice

to be done with the futile trying


but for relinquishing the form





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

LONG AGO

Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WINTER SOON

Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

GERTRUDE STEIN'S CRUISE (WITH MENU AND OUTCOMES)

heavy pork lucindas

bijou dutch banana

rat bottom turd catchers

wampum store ice house wreck


see the sea and pass the butter

'til you pass the udder

yank titty drained of carbonated soda

what have we done to the earl?


bromo instantaneously

vouch for glory in the bowl

a thorn is a thron is a thorn

explain that to Thanatos


then peach pie and a large melon

boom-laka-laka-laka....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

ALONE AT LAND'S END

Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

OUTSIDE THE COMPOUND

Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I'm busting through the hedges

I'm prancing on the lawn

I'm trying to convince

the forsaken that all is not lost


but who will take a mad man

at his word when the weight of the earth

pulls us down into a grave that cannot

catch the soul free of its silver cord?







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

all good wishes

to you and yours


we laugh and cry

the same


and our stories are

uniformly one


what I wish for myself

I wish for you too


all good wishes there if we want them....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

fool I am

and fool I'll be


as long as I take

my word to mean


all it wishes to do

but can't


because its hope

was groundless







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

what remains but the baby rattle

the rubber lamb

the bird mobile over the crib


first images in a life

that would turn hard and nasty

and yielding this memory image


far past its time but eternal in the mind

that remembers it being mesmerizing....





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

pausing a moment

in the flow of onrushing time


I am not there

I'm merely eyes hanging in the mist









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE LAST PETALS

the last petals drop from the branches

a loon shrills through the fog

I watch people emerge from the damp

quiet with the intense fear of being alive


as the petals drape their shoulders

and the holy mist swaddles their forms

hunching through the blowing spray

on this gray beach on the edge of the stable sea






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

give me your heart while you still can

nothing we've done to each other is unforgivable






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I leave you nothing but memories

of the days we were soft to each other


a constant presence of the heart

which endures despite the hurting of our pride







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

put a clamp on my fingers

put a choker on my throat


the hope of salvation lingers

while the reality of consequence sounds its note










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WARS OF OUR HEAVENS AND HELLS

the wars of our heavens and hells

poison the soul and fracture the mind


don't listen to what anyone tells

you about the joys to be left behind


you will discover for yourself

the greater joys once you have escaped


from the trance that takes you somewhere else

than where you need to be..your vision already shaped....







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

WATCHING

watching the stars cross the night sky

my memory is lost among the hopes

of holding firm until I'm released

and rejoin the stars in their flight







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the earth is still the rose-strewn rock

of peace and peril

and will be to its end


but we have yet to duff our world

so at variance with the power

that pushes all molten matter into forms


that for the briefest instant

reference Infinity before passing....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I LIVE

I live

I despair

but I live

I lose faith

but I live

I stumble on the way

but I live


I know not

what comes next

but I live

my doom or my salvation

but I live

let the One have the last word


but I live





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE HARD PATH

so much shame

so much regret


don't make such a deal over it

this is the bread of our Communion


the easy will slide down the chute

to whatever perdition they've earned


the rest of us took the hard path

and wonder exactly what the love of God is....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I STILL HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR

you dawg


you live to do mischief to me


luckily for you

I still have a sense of humor


and even if I still didn't get it


I'd know something would have


an impact on me and you who haunt

will indeed know how powerless you are


to stop me from my way out when

all you have will be nothing but the rubble


of whatever notion led you to this

tangle of aspiration and disappointment


as with you so with me


I too thought I would waltz into transcendence





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

VISION BEING MADE TO MATCH REALITY

easy to be led astray

just think for yourself

and see where

you end up and how


just because something

is meant to be

doesn't mean it will work out

as you expect


yes visualize all you wish

and be true to your vision

such as it may be

but yours is not the last word


and if the gold you were expecting

is like dross let it go and be steady for the next try....





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SEE EVERYTHING GO

so sorry to see everything go

what I possess is mine alone


but its substance is shared

its essence making us one


and when what is mine is dispersed

I will be sorry to go anywhere


but I'll wind up wherever

and call it home and keep doing so


until I know for sure it's home





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

A LESSON LOST

a lesson lost in the learning


a form I must repeat

casts a westward shadow


in the morning sun of the east

nothing is done yet


nothing is really ready to go

as I try to retain what I would keep


to leave the rest of the burden....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

AN OVERLAY

gray wet mornings


drinking tea at the window


seeing nothing but gray morning

tasting nothing but my dryness


memory so dense and familiar


it no longer enlightens


my life an overlay on this morning

this morning the grounds of my world







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.