LAZY HELL OF EARTH

the glorious heavens are converging

over the lazy hell of earth


but as above so below

so then tell how the stars and galaxies


can be joyous while the planet

convulses under ignorant human hunger?


do they know something we don't yet know

and are sending it to us in these shock waves?


with so many worlds occupying this earth

we see how one person's sin is another's virtue


how the most deserving go without

while the non-contributors roll in ease


what synthesis of holiness do we weave out of this?

we who have no idea what will come of our acts?












Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE SPECTRUM RANGES

in the realms of reality


good goes bad

and bad transmutes into good


and those shuttling between

those extremes find nothing


unusual at all

all of a day the spectrum ranges


over the whole reality of the heart









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

PHANTOM FORM

nothing stands for very long


the moment of accomplishment

is the instance of its passing


you struggle your whole life

to hold some phantom form


but already it changes in your hand

and disappears from within your fingers


its time passing faster as it turns to dust










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

TRICKLE DOWN THE CURB

slipping away


the wet twilight

of an autumn evening


traffic blaring

hunched bodies dampened

under useless umbrellas

pacing the puddled pavement

as storefronts shine in the dusk


this moment like

a drop of water

holding millions of living

particles in suspension


beginning to trickle down

the curb to the sewer grating

wet-legged I stand on the corner

to watch this instant


slipping away









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

my accomplishment lies beyond my control…

I do what I can…as well as I can…

and if it is achieved…it will be

because the One allowed it to be achieved…



and who of us here in the earth

really know if our failure is not

the accomplishment to be achieved?

who of us are strong enough

to accept the way life is?


imposing your will

will not shift tides nor will it

change the course of stars

I choose to work with the will

and even then I'm sure of nothing....










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

HOURGLASS

loins taut as a cougar 's haunches

eyes glowing in a green light


you return to my bed

and try to enter my dream


ideal lover who never showed


my sleep a hold against your assault

you will never come back to me

now that I'm empty of what attracted you


you denied me then

thus strengthening me against you


let your body be the 'hourglass

of eternity' and endless temptation


to the weak while I rise up at the alarm

and see you vanishing like vapor








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SHADE OF GRAY

thick blankets of cloud

bunching in the sky


the sun dims

then disappears


people moving briskly

on their business


trying to beat the rain

as a shade of gray covers the day








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

SOME KIND OF REDEMPTION

long defeated

in order to learn

the mercy is

in the downfall


we praise failure

as a truth

to teach how

one is to handle


the ascent

we succeed to

the measure by which

we acknowledge


our wrong

in the first place

but that requires

a patience and stillness


of nerve unheard of

in the unsparked soul

but needed to know

how the best one fails


is the measure how one succeeds








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THIS LONG AUTUMN

angels whisper to reprobate souls

somewhere crowding the aether

with compassion and regrets


the whole Void throbs with repentance

and vows to 'do better' in a future incarnation


but to those of us still in this life

all this sounds like the winds shaking

the multi-hued leaves from the trees








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

MORE REAL TO ME

dreams are more real to me

than the scenes of waking life


in the dream's afterglow

I lull in bed trying to energize myself


to leave this strange realm

for the ordinary tyranny of matter


but the pull on my mind is hard

and I long for another hour of sleep


before ruining the day by joining it








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

VOICES

I wish I could say I hear voices in my head


but no

the voices I hear yammer at me from outside

myself


and oh do they give me a piece of

their minds

while I ignore their judgments and dismiss them from


my contemplation








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I'm sick of trying to please you

I'm gonna have a fudge bar

I'm gonna eat starches by the bowlful

I'm gonna eat little batches of sugar


I'm gonna ruin myself in every way

instead of just asking you

to please stop whatever you're doing


this way I can have an excuse








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

REFLECTION

when the cows come home

the pigs get out


which would you

rather be?


but soon the cows wander out

and the pigs stagger back


which do you wish

you had been?








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THIN APARTMENT WALLS

the heaven's collapse

every time she comes home

yelling at the top of

her lungs at her doltish

sons


we hear it all night

until curfew

(thank God they sleep

sometimes)

and the husband returns


after a day

hiding in work

he capitulates and enters


and we all sleep









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

A PAUSE IN THE ACTION

people saunter

on the sidewalk

of an ordinary day


the world may be

going to hell elsewhere

but right here on this street


everything's cool

everything's alright












Content (c) 2008-2015Philip Milito.

the silhouettes of trees

in the fading light of dusk


containing all sunsets

that were or will be


and me in my temporary

life in this identity


all the melancholy

of the past


subsumes the falling night

absorbs all the mystery


and paints a scene

of realization holding more


that my mind could hold

or that my heart could bear....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the unforgiven

bear the burden

of all the good

they thought

they were doing


as bad as deliberate

evil that evokes

nothing but someone's

imagining of

their intent


the unforgiven

learn the hard way

they are unforgiven

even of themselves







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

age

reduces

all

strength


and

leaves

all

the


world

watching

over

you


as

you

rise

to


meet

and

finally

give


over

to

your

ultimate


place





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

OF MADNESS

I have

and need

no

excuse



I

peeked

behind the

veil










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the last circling birds

in the dusk


cry out to me

as if you were


calling from

a distance


I couldn't cover

in time to reach you....









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

a heavy difficulty

has been removed

from my life


but it's light

as the proverbial feather

compared


to all the other cares that will

bring me to my finish....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

long the egret stares at

the violet horizon to the west


no one sees him

nested in the blind









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

half a loaf is...still half a loaf

and less when shared with others


and therein the struggle of

the fullness of the strengthening will


but in which direction send

this acquiescence? to the hungry?


to the gainful? while a heel lies

in a gutter within the rat's clutches?







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

easy call


life being as predictable as it is


dreams will wilt in the mind

desire will dry out like a desert

amends will fix nothing

(the pieces having formed new wholes)


and as mercy will be weak as a weed

and love disappear like snow in the sun

and the only abundance will be unforgiveness


betting on all of these will not undo

the tiny surprises can could be an upset


it's all an easy call


and never beats any odds

especially the ones you lay....






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

glistering stars

on a cold autumn night


streets wind between buildings

like a maze


a rare passer-by out late

moves through the lamppost's spot of light


where went the warm dawn

whose copper sun shone slant


onto the awakening world

while I wept for all that was past?


the way to this moment was long and tough

but the moment itself briefer than brief


and now all that remains is

the rising of the last quarter moon






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

sad to see them go away

now that their time has passed


nothing can stay

as the process resolves at last









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

soft myths cuddle our unrealities


as if some giant would walk the earth

slaying our enemies with one swing

of his monumental club


or we'd wake up one day to the end

of war and horror and humankind's

psychosis over trying to kill God


or the wee hope that she'll come back

after the mess made by each in the

slow destruction of love


or that we awaken from these armored fantasies

that pass for all the holiness we can imagine

and drop the illusion of some easily granted salvation


making our unrealities the reality we bear....





Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the Word and all its surprises

the deafness of our ears

the inevitability of crisis

the lingering lesson of the years


we listen scratching our heads forsaken

in dreams God talks to us in gibberish

we can't even remember when we waken

haunting us until we're finished


the Word and all its surprises

the ignorance of our glory

all our egos rise up to deny this

and make of our lives some ghost story


the Word and all its tears

the lingering lesson of years







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

speaking to the air


and hearing my echo as your silence

you don't want to hear


and I don't want to know










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the decline is well underway


and the deeper and faster I careen down

the mountain of this life

the softer the focus

the heartening keen until happy memories


lose their sorrow and shine again

as they did in their instants of happening


do not fear the onrushing ground that is

merely a curtain before the sky


as if in falling I was rising up


rising up








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

best to end it when it's still fresh

this wish and hope to transcend

and be blessed

or to succeed as a master of the earth

or to reclaim an unfixable love


do not let the ideal linger

until you see for yourself its failure

and have only it on your hands









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito

I've watched the sun drive

the clouds to their knees

slowly but relentlessly all morning


and as the middle of the day passed

to evening the sun broke out at last


just as it was going down....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

you look at me as if I knew

what hell is coming next


oh just lucky guesses

based on past performance


and no definitive answer

to embarrass me if I'm wrong


and you would do better to look

at yourself


you're as likely to not get it as I am








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

does the preacher preach

for the welfare of his flock


or to preen like a peacock

to flash each one to each?


both...there are so many imperfect

ways to approach you O Only One


and You are as useless in your mercy

as the preacher and flock are in their faux humility









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

well where the hell are all of you?


suddenly you're absent from my daily ritual

and the high-flying birds are happy


to float hundreds of feet above the earth

not to hear my raging disappointment


or to be preached to as if you didn't know

and even what you think you know is suspect


wherever the hell you all are...stay there....











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I didn't know

until I looked back


how much damage

I shared with other


members of my family

who are these people


and what were we to each other

that we're here now with our familiar


and recognizable aches? what do we

owe each other?


whose to say? we engage with each other

alternately pinning each other to the mat


and you did or you didn't or fuck you

it's all your fault and no one's to blame


and everyone's to blame and oh shit leave it be

so many of us leave it behind in the ruins of our lives


let god rifle through the trash and find things

with which to punish us


we've moved on and so have those who've harmed us

and all get what's coming to them anyway








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

let those who love hearing

the wind whistle through their teeth

preach truths that everyone learns eventually


their words and their egos

soar to the heights

of the world's limited ceiling


and leave them farther from truths

then when they began










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I thought I had enough juice to make it through

my strong constitution misleading me

into pushing past limits and into a bereft future

I couldn't imagine with projecting the past


but I see now I've emptied the tub

and that remains is the ghost of a commitment

to what may not have been mine to do

but I've done enough of it and carry nothing


but the responsibility and what will come of that

is for me to find out after I've straggled long enough

as a timid weakening shell of my life force

oh mark this as done and what's to come


but a shadow projected forward as the continuity

of a stumbling man shivering before the idea of "what next"








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the past is a ruin

the present slogs through

to get to some future

yet to arrive


but from start to finish

alpha to omega

the present is a ruin built on the past

and a future some imagining of repair









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

when leaves fall

the will goes with them


the last furious colors

bleeding into tufts on the branch


and then like the will

the leaves go to brown


and fall

their season of purpose done


like the will








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the way to survive in god's creation

is to ignore god and do what you

know is right


we drop from grace or rise afresh

contingent on what god has to say

about anything


and fuck it we'll do what we know we must

and whatever comes of it deserves all the hell of that maniac








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

DEVIL DOGS

oh little pups of da Lawd


how attentive they are

at sinking their teeth into a hem


and slathering us with sloppy kisses

while the evil element of the One


slips in to make the Self feel invincible

among the growling little pups


who'll tear you to shreds with love








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

sorry? you bet I am


even like trying to slog through

a wet field in hip-high boots


dealing with people who'll

never understand you


can drag you so far down

that the only comfort is thinking


sorry does nothing but at least I'm free to go











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

INTERVENTION?

don't be so proud of yourself


you're fresh from therapy

and ready to correct everyone else


(just like a religious convert)

when all you're doing is extending


the scope of your personal reign of terror

you see now why no one including your friends


takes you seriously

ask them if they'll really be honest with you


they'll put you through some "intervention"

and all they'll be talking about


is extensions of themselves trying to save you

and themselves in one neat realization


no one should be proud of this until they can really be honest

and if there's still dissension


then hold the mirror up to yourself

even knowing what's wrong with you


can become an excuse to hide behind

and the whole show your own exposure


even if I get involved out of compassion's sake

I'll hope to know enough to listen much and speak little


and never thank you for the good you thought you were doing






Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

we are born into families

in order to die of them


you evade an enemy

in one life


and find yourselves together

in another life as relatives


and we die of these families

in which we are suffered to be born









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

look who clammers for respect

and does not one thing to merit it


the majority think is that their freedom

is more important than anyone else's


and takes pride of place in the unending

list of slights and presumptions


and triumphs one thinks one needs

to affirm not respect and love but self-affirmation









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I tried to explain the pinwheeling stars

and the big heart that enclosed it all


but who wanted to hear it?

everyone is their own savior


and the quality of experiences

do not really vary


everyone is their own special case

as useless as me on my own pile of shit











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I plot and plan

but have no control over outcomes


I do what I must and then

flee until conditions will support my contrition


and if I cannot understand

I'm beaten here and whatever comes when


it will shall do little but affirm the continuum

that will purge me of my condition


do I think this true?

I really don't know


all shifts around my instant of action

and I'm left where I am in any case


so all I do tends to show ignorance in motion

and I'm better left waiting on where I will go







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

to no advantage can I utilize

my will-to-good


the World always seems to gain

in tearing hearts in two


doubling the quantity of quiet anguish


while under my idea of will-to-good

something bubbling hot in me is rising up


to overthrow a notion like advantage and make move....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

closing circles is harder to do

than your positivistic "good thoughts"

can inspire you to do


anything you do fucks up the so-called "flow"

because the very mind that ascertains

blocks the very process to convey you forward


do all creation a favor

stop trying to rule the universe as One far above you


weeps for laughter












Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

mercy is only the still moment

between catastrophes


those who believe in rest

speak of these fugitive instants


that arise from an easing of attention

and disappear as quickly as the next


calamity rears its head and you are back

in the earthbound assaults of our mortality







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

you will see for yourself

the spilling of your fate

across many borders that exist

only in the minds that accept them



then you will know the hopelessness

of your endeavors to cultivate miracles

while you ignore the very blooms

that rise beneath your feet








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I couldn't recall my last happiness

'til it crept out of my brain

and faded as I awakened


and the afterglow of dream

wrapped around me

for another 15 minutes


soften re-entry into the daily concrete

nightmare of our testing








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

FIRE ANT WISE

what could be

more inspiring to

all of us

in this ecology


than to study

and revere

the fire ant cluster

floating in the rush of water


to stay afloat

to stay upward


what could be

more inspiring

the fire ant cluster

atop the rushing water







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

fools will drag you into their holes

wise men will lead you astray once you're out


a clean shiny member of the hierarchy will bear down

on you and make you understand


that your freedom is a hinderance

to the smooth workings of the Machine


so you dig back into a hole

or stray beyond where (you hope) they can't find out










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

my head rumbles beneath

its own thought


my consciousness

tries to reach into the sky


but my head is under the ground

like an ostrich


and like an ostrich's cry

is muffled by our own entombment









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

EXPLAIN

explain to the night sky

why you think you deserve a break


the wheel-chaired palsy victim

down the hall has it worse


the newly blind listen to the lifers

with ears super-attuned


the unemployable broken man

waiting for his last meal of hamburger and a drink


on the corner that is his territory

yes you too can wind up so defiled in this world


your parents wouldn't stand up for you

but if it's down to you


you're better draining the wound at last

healing will heal if you don't wish to die in your imagination








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

NOTHING NOW

I am sure of nothing now

I walk the street and observe the sprawl

my business is done and my living is too

but why am I still here?


I've made enough god-damned mistakes

to last five lifetimes or more

and I don't relish handling all of them

but why am I still here?


is it a worse fate?

a price beyond my knowing?

a last lick before entering the chute?

but why am I still here?










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THE DELUXE DEAL

I hang in the balance

but it 's been so my whole life


God may muscle

every whit of the price


but now and then a price is paid

in full...then what is God's vengeance


when you're totally broke

and no sign of mercy flutters


on your head?








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

LEARNING TO PLAY THE WORLD

I'm not a great one for trouble

I let the hordes go by


meandering after them I see

their dust is a disappearing gargoyle's head


their passing is a smudge on the day

and before I know it


I'm on top of the hill in twilight

some scowling invisibility wailing in the the stars


blind and deaf to our presence but not to the degree

as to raise lament up from the ground


as the hordes filter back inquisitively

and I see from my vantage a way of secrecy


that could not draw a hordes's attention because

I'm not a great one for trouble (though it still takes work


to avoid it so there's some kind of benefit to someone)












Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

nervous over the silence

the darkness of night

the hope of day


no one can relax

knowing anything can come

from either of these


the edgy expectations fulfilled

the terror of being alive mightily stoked








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

dark and sinister as they can be

clowns do make the world lighter


they bring out all you hide

and mock it in front of you


no wonder people are creeped out

by them or find easy targets


for their frustration...who wants to be faced

by an unapproved image?











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

the broken-hearted

do not hope for

miracle or escape


they know every ache

and know it makes

the reality for this acceptance


of the damage and the comfort

their pain confers on them









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THIS AUTUMN

this autumn is cool

but the trees are a drab brown


very little color to the leaves

after this dry summer


somewhere a loon cries in the rill

perhaps mourn the passing


of the warmth as mists massage

all plants and trees and the high moon above











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

another beginning is

as fraught with anxiety

as a dreaded ending


to redo this form

unsure of what was

fair or foul


should ease the fear since it's

all one and you know it











Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

MUSE UNAMUSING

I saw you moving through dark alleys

as if you wished not to be seen


stupidly I followed (being young

and horny and idiotic about it)


and in that darkness like a black hole

I've been entrapped


I may never again see the

bright lights of the boulevard


but I'll have plenty of time

to berate the so-called brilliance


of my so-called brain

yes it's the common mistake of all men


and so do the "blind rage" bit

while the eyes of others adjust....







Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

GOING TO SLEEP

the best thing in going to sleep


is the disintegrating thought

signaled in babble


with the world around you fading

and some inner scene leaps before


your attention with its own antic view

and "things to say"


like an overlay of two different worlds

concurrent in your bedroom


leaking dream-matter into the conscious brain

that suddenly pulls itself from this barrier


of shadow worlds and snaps awake for the last look

at the outer world slipping into darkness


and the dream world reasserting itself








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

BREAKING RANKS

here I cannot be seen

here I cannot be heard


I stand in the middle

of a common mob


and no one hears or sees

what I portray


the Void around each of us

that allows all things to happen


are we strong enough

to handle this degree of responsibility?


are we in tune with cosmic waves of energy?

I stand in the middle of a mob


because it is safest there at least until some

asshole plays the "God" Card and breaks ranks....








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

thrashing branches

imitate the rage

of your defeat


alas

the story doesn't end

until the skin halts


in its trek through

this futile forest

but that isn't all


the soul continues

and knows directly

the thrash of branches


while the rage under this storm

is trivialized to gracious surrender










Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

THIS ONE

I draw fortitude for a few days

from gray wet mornings like this one


there's always an awareness of childhood

just behind the mind as I gaze


on the rain glazed trees so like ourselves

but for the extended range of different times


and from this window postulate a creation

not as stringent as this one












Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

I better keep moving

I'm lost and afraid

but there's no relief

I better keep moving


I'm lost and afraid

every path leads to

a wall I cannot scale

I'm lost and afraid


but there's no relief

the memory fixed and set

the identity comprehensive and empty

but there's no relief


and I go lost and afraid though there's

no relief and see I am better at moving








Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

turning low under twilight


bats wings hack rapidly the air

zagging over the trees


and disappearing into the branches

of a gray evening...









Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.

ECLIPSE OF SEPTEMBER 28

the chocolate moon

spread its faint burnt glow


over 1/2 the Western Hemisphere

digging out the last remnants of self


to salute this disruption

in our energies and our creations


what will come...no doubt...will have

its own violent twist of judgment


and justice will be a mercy if you get it...

but I have little at the moment to do


but stare at the ruby-ringed smudge

(from our kitchen window too no less...)


when a world was changed but no one

suspected a thing when they woke....













Content (c) 2008-2015 Philip Milito.