I am empty

I am plain

I am done

all the same

do not seek me

I am insane

from trying to become

free of my blame

somebody loves me

but I do not know who

what can they see

in me that is so

worthy of trust and confidence?

what can I give that won't give offense?

I wish I knew what to say

I wish I knew anyway

but if you love me

enough to take any risk

be careful... I may fail you easily

even as your intentions insist

on what it totally

beyond its control

oh be careful when you love me

I may drag you into a hole

of despair and I won't mean to

but that's how it will go

because I am done...and you

will come the hard way to know...

Content (c) 2008-2012 Philip Milito.

kiss it...

Content (c) 2008-2012 Philip Milito.

do you really need to be told

at this late date

what is happening to you

in the groove of your fate?

am I the one to tell you?

who appointed me teacher and provocateur

in the name of a faith

I myself can barely trust?

if you want relief go elsewhere

if you want despair come to me

I defy every edit of warning

because I've gotten resentful

paying for sins without end

if God thinks He'll regain

our love and devotion He's sadly mistaken

His own inexorable law

is 'like begets like'

and how can we transcend when all he can do

is rub our noises in the very shit

from which we are trying to transcend?

join me here in the depths of our pleasures

they are scant and swift...and more precious for it...

and if God wants us so badly

and does not will us to perish

then let Him get off His throne

and show the very things

He demands of us

otherwise let Him blame Himself for everything

for which he takes no responsibility

even as he'll always pass the liability off on us

join me

our tiny time is infinite

in comfort against the inevitable

and the pain of its inevitability...

Content (c) 2008-2012 Philip Milito.

oh you thought forgiveness

was a given

a gift you needed nothing to earn

but nothing is given

and nothing retains its value

before the next onslaught

of actuality

and of its intractability...

Content (c) 2008-2012 Philip Milito.

my thoughts have no bearing on reality

I know

they play on some screen in my mind

and overlay the reality

I see with my eyes

and any connection is tenuous...

Content (c) 20082-102 Philip Milito.

oh the crazy pledge of repentance

and all the grief showering like shit

over your uncovered head

we may be cut like diamonds

from our own dust

but sometimes I suspect gouging

but that is desire

the hope (the wish) to improve

without sacrificing anything

well I live in this world

despite my projections beyond these bounds

and if the way up and the way down are One

know that I'll eat your ass

but I won't eat your shit...

Content (c) 2008-2012 Philip Milito.

he passes a smile on the street

dully pleased someone still wants to suck him

but it's far too late to reciprocate

and his sarcasm locks him into his reckonings

oh fate oh miserable unalterable fate

contrition means nothing

your prayers and best efforts mean nothing

vengeance first

then your remains gathered...

Content (c) 2008-2012 Philip Milito.