yet another summer--

yet another summer in the World--

how many more in my life

how many more in the world

in full light of longest day

we stroke our chins

and pick wedgies out of our brains

adjusting to the total disclosures

on our faces in the instant we make them--

so that in the briefest night

we turn over in sweat reimagining

the reactions to our exposures--

the vanity that is our consciousness--

sorry or justified or (dare I say) illuminated--

how many more summers of renewals

before we forget ourselves in the lush blooming

how many more before we awaken just as

this high eternal instant    also passes--

         

                                                                                  *

completion is all inclusive--

just do what you do 

and you'll always be

done--

                                                                                *

evidence 

we leave evidence 

with every move

willed or not

might as well

identify yourself

by announcing

you've eaten

a can of corn--

wear a sandwichboard

proclaiming 

the diner's name--

                         

                                                                            *

every act every achievement

preserved forever

on the permanent record--

well could Blake proclaim--

just think on the thing

and it is done--

it is    and it is--

                                                                          *

so many dreams

seeping out through cracks

in the will--

do not reign them--

follow them on flight

with your chosen medium

Thought Act and Will

capturing for this plane

the planeless vision--

                                                                           *

i keep talking

waiting for the One

to answer

and the One

does answer

but in silence

so that i 

cannot hear

as i am not meant to

with ear alone

and i forget this

at my chagrin

     my Spirit cringing

having heard--

                                                                         *

if we do not see each other

again in this life

know I enjoyed the company

and you'll always be welcome

wherever I am

if nothing else

                                                Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito. 

I'd have given no thought to my daily distress

had it not been for others

still strong in their sense of purpose

still vivid in their renderings

their creativity total

their aspiration for the work itself

unstinting and necessary as air to breathe--

I'd have gone on with my mute achievements

behind me and part of the fabric

of our earthly living and me tired

the work itself done with no hope of reward

except that the thing itself IS done and what it is

(I'd be the last person to know what I'm about or

what these works are--they are for whoever will

receive them and I only for whatever I am

beyond my own knowing)

but eventually it all winds down to this--

the time alive in this skin dwindling

and all this skin has experienced forming

my full content--and my end the dispersal

of this life among the young just beginning

or reaching the fullness of their meaning--

as I fade  yet I glow brighter--their reflected

fire lighting in me the source each of us shares--

and that daily distress is smoothed away

by the closing of my way

even as somehow I go along with them

on theirs--

                             Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito

lust like tearing tides

turmoil of frustrated heart

and unsettled disheveled mind

seeing the glowing damn thing

before me in sight

and nothing I would use

to get to it and realize it working

in art or detached meditation

or even in its basic element

of churning loins and ecstatic spout

---oh the heavens in my head

a fury lately and all the hell I want to do

is heal myself of a life battered and beaten

by precisely this needful nerve uproar

     and I spill in an unmerciful

eddy of nerves the only jitter

on a Zen lake of limpid sustenance

a mockery just by being all that 

I would wish to be--

but the wish not enough--

nor the desire that upends

the Will--

lost for the moment

to the perfect breasts and ass and legs

of a faceless perfect woman

and found after in the  limpid lake

storm passed on but unchanged

in its tattered float--

                                                                               *

I will grope my way forward--

I'll go as far as there are walls to guide--

after that I spill with everything else in this world

in unmerciful flux--and end where I will--right near where I began--

                                   Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

have nothing serious to fret--

did all I could to amend--

I'm glad I made it this far and no farther

happy the measure is complete--

                                                                             *

so much--

thought of you drains all strength

and I've no reason to believe

it could be otherwise--

pity the fool who worships

his imagination--he learns

hard that it torments

so much--

                                                                             *

for this moment I am free

but only because this moment has passed--

                                                                             *

think on it

and then     forget

your harrowing hasn't

happened yet--

                                                                            *

all best to believe--

and so easy

                                                                            *

such is the world

that visionaries found businesses

and that clerks run them into the ground

                                                                           *

no one misses you

after a while

     people should

be grateful

                                                                          *

again the fool

but I knew it

and I find

the irritation sweet

                                                                         *

                     Content (c) 2008-2009  Philip Milito

anxiety

thick as southern air--

swamp mist and iron rain-

falls into my muscles

like venom--

my flesh liquid as wish

fulfilling physics

into its down-dropping

surge toward  Will

pooling like a stasis

in the brain pan of a 

some fake mystic

who never saw past his

move through the gunnels

of some heavenly terrace

he imagined once to be

his vision of the Infinite--

     here only does even

the anxious ignorance

wash down  fresh as

blooming in a yard of one's own

acquiescence

                                                                              *

what heart now to broach

on the question of loneliness--

none

no one is alone--

no one need say a thing--

only

the heart would do so

that did not know itself

                                                                          *

                         Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

gray again

animals two by two

waddling on the curb

now I'm worried

                                                                            *

weak and empty...

                                                                           *

air dense as plaster

the body merges with mist

                                                                          *

no light in the apartment

save the dull milky

morning light

       a sheen on the walls

an uplit gradation

along the ceiling

                                                                          *

I slog in step   daily

when will my life resume?

I know for fact

others feel like this

equally helpless

to face the old life  gone

and the new one 

forming around

the defining wound

as if it were done

before it'd begun

each step measured

the pace adjusted

and grind in place

daily just to gain an inch

                                                                              *

                       Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito

Rinsed in violent rain--

Refreshed heart

In weary beaten waves

Where all remains--

                                  

                                                                            *

My mouth moves

Mimicking silence--

     Were I as wise

As I posit--

                                                                           *

I follow her flesh--

Spirit seeking spirit

                                                                          *

One listens

Hears nothing

Is satisfied

                                                                         *

In the warm thrust

Of ecstasy--

Pure consciousness 

Of being--

Souls seek what mates

They find

And ascend together

Kind with kind

                                                                             *

ALL IS LIGHT!!!!----

except where

all our

shadows block...

      

                                                                            *

There is nothing

--And therefore

    A place for

Everyone and thing

                                                                          *

I would have you

Ever with me

Wherever in body

We are

                                                                        (these words for Ali xoxo)

                                                                         *

extras:

I saw past

The boundaries

     And was paralyzed--

Now past

Paralysis--body has

     Caught up to mind--

Slow movements of age

     Finally in step

                                                                           *

I woke again

to stale fate

as if a change

of world happened

while I slept--

Even the pigeon

cooing outside

this window

peers in

as reprimand

     "I peck

at crumbs

and shit

on cars

and statues--

what do

YOU do?"

                                                                                *

                       Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.