Wednesday, August 31, 2011

pain and suffering may be

the result of selfishness

but there are times

prayer and devotion are also manifestations

of selfishness

both have that inescapable emphasis

on self

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
find out

all your faith

has just been a delusion

and when you're done

cursing the sky

weep until

a calm drains

your eyes

and see clearly

for the first time

your true way forward

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
when I am

approached by

an earnest

concerned type

I think to myself

oh am I in for it

what soft insinuating


in the service

of alleged righteousness

I'd almost rather

by accosted by a raving


fundamentalist maniac

now that I'm familiar with

with that I know what I'm getting

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
how can so many people love me

when I can't even believe

in loving myself?

what do they see

that God and I can't?

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
the world's running out of gas
but we've got enough to get us to the crash...

(with acknowledgment to Ron White...ol' 'Tater Salad')

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
and what will replace the systems of 2,000 years
now that they are finally falling?
what will be the new dispensation?

the soul's weight in gold?

the 'correct' tyranny of 'brotherhood'?

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
isn't it bizarre that people can forgive
but God cannot?

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

so far the New Age looks like
a new dressing-up of old tyrannies

the compulsory respect for people's inanities
or the backlash of any opinion not in line with those inanities

what in the name of all that's allegedly holy
will it take for people to mean it

when they cite the Golden Rule?
when will people realize they don't need a religion

or a political system to do right? I'd better knock this off
people might lynch me for talking such wistful sense...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
you have nothing to gain and nothing to lose
it's level across the board

any direction you're likely to choose
will be right to be assured

must I be trite enough to point out
it's what you do makes the difference?

if you don't underestimate my concern about
your sharpness you'll be fine even without a point of reference

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
it's lonely at first
stumbling around in a new world

until you note the many ways it resembles
the old world left behind

have no fears of anything
whatever new age approaches

it's still the same old world
and the new age will address it as it must

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
believe in nothing but yourself

just make sure that includes not even believing in yourself

you have no idea of the totality of creation

just stick to your road and you'll get where you're going

and to hell with everything

including the Almighty

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
you move through the Void
you're stopped
you flow around the obstacle
you hit another
you flow around that
you endure catcalls
you endure endless bullshit
you don't know
where you are going or why
but you know your on your way
you no longer believe in fairy-tale deities
you no longer believe the lies
of family and friends
and lovers if it comes to that
you continue
on the path you've chosen
no matter what blocks it
no matter what other way opens up
follow it
follow it to its end
you will reach that end and
you will begin again
you will even know
it's neither end nor beginning
but just another stone in the road
just another test of the God the Unforgiving
but let God be boss if he wants it so badly
you know where you're going
you know what you're doing
even if you don't know where
even if you don't know what
even if you don't know how
you will do what you have it in you to do
and to hell with everything else

to hell with everything else

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
all bets are OFF God damn it

everything we falsely believe is finally falling apart

while everything to which we aspire is coming together

of course this is still the world so no guarantees

but fuck it I'm so damn happy to see

the bastards get what's coming to them

even if God's ham-fist takes me down with them...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
oh excellence!
I've been dying to rip down the world my whole life
and now finally
God is taking up the grunt work...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
how bizarre
the closer I get to death
the more alive I feel

oh I'll cart so much shit with me
into a future life but for now
dropping this life's load

will be a blessing of peace
beyond anything we can imagine

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
broken beyond repair
I crawl to the place
where I entered this world

and find it under a tombstone
she's been gone most of my life
and now as mine draws to an end

I stop crawling
waiting to be shoveled under where
my tombstone will be

going out as I came in...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
O Eternal...You win!
our prayers our pleadings our attempts to amendment

mean nothing to You...
and how many lives wasted in fear and shame and pain

who gave all for You
the not-good the not-graceful the not-forgiving

but pure cold vengeance
and the pleasure of disabusing the creatures

You created to assuage Your vanity...You win
and are such a poor winner about it

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

the Top Gangster pulverizes us again

the extortion of payment for salvation or else

you have to be a made man to get to heaven

while the poor and broken decay at the bottom of creation

in concrete shoes and a mistaken faith in a God

of love and forgiveness

Content (c) 2008-2011 Phiip Milito.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

to be dead is to be empty
to be empty is to be free
to be free is to be alive
to be alive is to be dying

happily to say fuck to all that shit
is Life itself

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
if I were God
I'd be ashamed to admit it

the grief and misery I'd put people through
in the name of some bogus perfection

there is no freedom there is no love
only some infernal Ineffable

pouring grease down the rope
to which we cling...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
you want poetry?
you won't find it here anymore

you don't even know what it really is
just as you don't know

your own mind about anything

praise yourself

make much of nothing
but you won't find it here anymore...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

a moment of panic and anxiety
followed by hours and days
of bemused reflection

so our passing
from life to life to life

so our constant flux of being

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
friends become enemies
enemies become friends

and all struggle under the weight
of their bonds

who will fall
and who will rise

in larger hands
than ours

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
the new way forward opens

no ground holds
and all we have to lead us

is the heart

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
stressed people
wandering the streets

crazy to talk
under the empty sky

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
solar storms

looks like
the Apocalypse Game
is afoot

wherever we are
is where we'll be

as given

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Monday, August 22, 2011

every day the world starts again
and every night it stops
but only where you are
and only in your world

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
this is the way the world ends--

not with a bang but a foreclosure...

(with a nod to Old Possum, the Banker)

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

it really is a fraud to talk about
art and religion and politics and working
for your daily bread as if they were separate things

the truth is they are all aspects of One Process
and it is only our personal nonsense
that is our own ego imaginings

that make a problem of applying what we know
to be true
this comes tough hard for an old dog like me

who for all his spiritual pretensions
would look for the golden opportunity
to seize to grasp to hold and be inflamed

by success or passion or entitlement to a reward
even while I knew better while I knew differently
because everything in life is a fraud

the idea that you could be a master of the universe
in whatever field whether plain old power
or sexual conquest or whatever it is we need

to oppress another to get what we want
it 's all crap it's all ego it's all death
and the pain of knowing on top of whatever

others might say
that you're nuts you're crazy you've been alone too long
the actual Truth is a reality beyond all our scheming

and will reward or punish us according
to our true righteousness
it is hard to maintain this truth in the earth

where all is delusion and gratification of ego
even among those who think they are right
with God

I cannot contain this fullness of awareness
I feel like I'm going to explode at any instant
because God leaves us to suffer own path

pay for our own transgressions
do what we do to be as Dylan said
'something more than something we invest in'

yes nothing we've known applies any longer
everything is finally breaking down
and even your Plan B 's are no longer dependable

everything's on the table
all the cards are spread out
and now we walk it like we talk it or pay heavily

a price none of us can really afford in earthly terms
unless we are willing to accept our price accept our fate accept
our duplicity in the snares of perfection

and own up
and whatever comes of it comes of it
because a Heart greater than ours

will soothe us
if this isn't so that truly nothing matters
but as tough as God's Love is

it is merciful
if you believe there's nothing after this life
then nothing is what you'll get and you'll miss nothing

if you believe Life is Eternal
then that is your track
and you will continue

even if the way forward looks like God
messing with you every inch of the way
as long as you're alive there is no death

so be true to your work your spouse
even your whore if that's the case
we're all in this together

and it's all of us or none of us make it
and for those who are hell-bent on domination
pity or pray for them

because God had the last word on everyone and everything
if you believe life is nothing but dog-eat-dog
then that is how you'll die and die out

if you believe in God's Love (ego and agape)
then you will follow
adventure after adventure

until the final approach to God sees you
clean and absolved and ready for your place
in the Permanent

I have no faith in this earthly time
of even coming on to that perfection
I'm too busy worrying all I've done or should have done

may I and all who are at this level
learn surrender upon our acceptance
may we finally be shown at least

the way out of this earthly suffering
that is murderous illusion
to all who wish to transcend but cannot

because of their false creeds and easy beliefs
God gives us enough rope every chance we get
may we finally wise up and know

it doesn't have to be this way...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Saturday, August 20, 2011

humanity grabs the last strands
of life as it was known

as it slides off these greased ends
it learns its death is its own

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
the tyrant in the mirror

in a house of mirrors

in facing mirrors of an unending chain of images

multiplied by how many other tyrants

in a house of mirrors

in facing mirrors

looking at each other

seeing themselves...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Friday, August 19, 2011

when all we love is taken from us

we mourn or draw a sigh of relief

or both in many cases

how can one not shudder

facing the infinite possibilities

in our all too finite scope

when all we love is taken

we're bound tighter or off the hook

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
damn it damn it damn it damn it damn it


now I feel good as new...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

the compassion and empathy we extend to others should not be predicated on
'fortunate' or 'unfortunate' (this is where politics fails unequivocally...)

in the realms of compassion even Mother Teresa is not so unique...she also
had her despair and questioned the value of her endeavors...
but she knew in her heart the wisdom of the old saw: "Love and do what you will
and let God keep the books"

we do our part and leave the results in larger hands than ours...
besides what could disturb the more revolutionary...than 'walking
the talk'? this 'mass of humanity' is an illusion...a perspective on being...
and behind each perspective is an actual human being...each one of us...

the greedy and the powerful are evil as such because they make it
their business to consciously destroy this living love and hope and compassion...
and by nature of our Oneness it takes each individual to help all
who yearn for better...I personally doubt that our race will ever be

on the same webpage as far as this goes...we're all just 'passin' through'
as the song goes...but it is not a vain thing to strive for it...beyond this
we get into metaphysics...and why bother...when the Infinite is
contained in precisely these 'small' human moments of contact?

'I and Thou' as Buber put it...
and so it is...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
I've found in my experience that too often
the fortunate have a callous on the heart...
and so have no comprehension of or compassion for
the sufferings of others...

unless it becomes personal
and even then they may see themselves as a special case
i.e. "Why is this happening to ME?"
It happens to everyone...

there may be too many used to having their own way
and unfortunately their tantrums will not solve any problems...
may indeed add to those problems...
as always it is a matter of personal awareness and a sense of

responsibility which as we can see for ourselves these days
is utterly lacking...
we build a better world one person at a time
but now we few seem to be outnumbered...

because too many will not get with that program...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

there is nothing more foul or ignorant than the vituperation of the fortunate...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

flesh is weary and soul
so tired of waiting for release
from this rotting meat

I have no strength left
but the Almighty insists on no hope
for me and a slow painful passing

so be it
I've found the hard way love and mercy
are not in God's vocabulary

but pain and vengeance most certainly are
so let Him take me as He will
("a brave thing to do" said another on his way out)

if I've mastered forgiveness through all this then I'll be alright
how about you O Holiest of Holiest won't you try forgiveness too?

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
now are you happy O Holy Thing?

you crushed out Your price
with no mercy at all

no forgiveness no grace no love
and spirit guides and guardian angels

are just thugs in Your employ
would I'd died in ignorance You gouged out my price

oh now are you happy O Holy Thing?

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
I'd wish you well
but I know better
so instead I wish you

Content 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
it is crushingly hard on the spirit

to look at your fellow man and think

God makes us in his image

so hard to learn how rigged life on earth truly is

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
I will not miss what is to pass
on this earth

you who think you're blessed
think again

what is to come will only kill you
as ordained

by the One who you think will
save you

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
I wish to be remembered
as a giant bear

who loved to pick flowers

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
I'm through with the treachery of everyone
from God on down to the lowest scum

I've had it I've had it I've had it
I hiding out in myself until they

get tired of looking for me
and carry the body out of my room my cell

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
the last civilities slip away

as each man proclaims himself God

neighbor rises up and is wolf to neighbor

and a snarling mob of so-called humanity

claws its way the poor and weak

something small that cannot escape them

I'm afraid I've just tipped my hand

and have shown that I've survived from a time

when the packs were held at bay

while something held in common was truly blessed

oh I know the world has never been a paradise

nor will it ever be

but never has there been such a ravening

and never have their been such demons in human form

proclaiming the so-called good and the allegedly holy

the last civilities slip away and with them

the last of our humanity

as each man dies his own Satan

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

let us now praise the piss pot
the commode the toilet bowl
that receives the leavings of our earthly extravagances
waste for some and fertilizer for others
let us the throne upon which we sit
the altar of our offerings

let us now praise sex
chokin' that chicken a mile a minute
or massagin' those lips into a creamy froth
piston jabs or intake holes
jelly rolls with an option for more
let us now praise those consumed in the heat
or sit and ponder thinking
what monkeys we look like....and laugh...

let us now praise our pitiful hungers
let us anoint us passions and compulsions
let us gamble and plot our moves to advantage
so we may jockey for our positions
in our imagined salvations

this is the life this is the sorrow
this is the promise on which
we beg steal or borrow
forgive the cliche but be that as it may
that is the central fact
of our living on this brutal rock
whose privations are one with its beauties

let us now praise the wisdom
that teaches there's an end to this
and out of it a fresh start
to calm the heart
and renew the spirit
in as far as we admit that this is how it is...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Friday, August 12, 2011

oh mama's got it in for me now
and there's no escape I can rig
I went to market and paid for a cow
but they delivered a pig

Content (c)2008-2011 Philip Milito.
reality intrudes on the prettiest theories
strengthens the bitter
and shames the deluded
and it's never any different here in the earth

but for our individual styles producing
bitter shames and strengthened delusions
and even this novelty is always the same
always the same always the same

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
pity those who awaken to the true nature of God--
for consciousness is their hell

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
I live day to day wearing a disguise--

by pounding my hoof and braying like a jackass
I could pass for anybody

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
no one's gonna win outright

no one's gonna be able to hide

everyone's gonna lose the fight

everyone's gonna be turned outside

see ya there

o soeur et frere

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
favorite movie deaths:
crushed heads
exploding bodies
eaten alive in one monstrous gulp
disintegrated by ray gun
sinking in quicksand
sucked out of airplane by window or fuselage damage
falling from a skyscraper or mountain

ah my inner yahoo lookin' for a bucket of popcorn
and a halter-topped hottie in cut-off short-shorts at the movies

(oh--I so want to belong....)

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
Perseid meteors this weekend--
what does it mean?

don't mean shit...

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

to know no forgiveness

is to know no mercy

would it be

easy and kind and certain

but no

forgiveness must be worked for

for mercy to come

whatever my failings I'll keep working

because forgiveness isn't the gift

grace is

I don't have that gift

but I but we do have the promise

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

I've made my peace

at least in my own head

with stark raving mad humanity

but even that's not good enough for these maniacs

they won't rest until they level everything

that came before them

so they can substitute the bubbles they inhabit

and even then they'll turn and destroy that racket

I needn't go down fighting

I know now how age will have the last word on us all

unless they murder themselves during one of their rampages

and frankly that's better than all right with me

let God damn me for not blessing my enemy

it is they that destroy all Oneness

maybe some other life I'll be stronger

but for now they're welcome to their slow decay

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

So clear now...

Impossibly clear I could've kicked myself

For hesitating to confront the knowledge sooner...

That the blindness of my vanity...the remorse of my egotism

Locked me into my reckoning...

But then I am no longer 'me'

I have added to a long series of other 'me's

To form the entity I am...

With which one of you do you wish for 'me' to deal?

At the least I've survived long enough to look back

And not be ashamed...

Freed of the past

I'll find what is left of the we say here on earth...


a note to yukonnoka: Please...please...more David Blue on You Tube!

thank you...

Content 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
Hope has always been my downfall
And faith always my fatal mistake

Selfishness in all selflessness
Turning gold to clay

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

blessed is he who is strong enough to go it alone--

his love and his help are one with his autonomy--

his unflinching response to each individual

whom he encounters pure I and Thou--

he is pure consciousness of his condition

and comprehension of Oneness with other's conditions--

in the Name of God and in the Light of the Eternal

I wish I were honest enough to be that to myself and others

even as I recognize my failure in this--

let done be done with all said and done--

as blessed as he who goes it alone

is he who knows when to stop

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
you are not here to save the world--

you are here to be disgraced

you are here to suffer to no good end--

that is how atonement works--

to reason with unreasoning brutes--

to be a peacemaker to those who worship war--

to be in impossible spots and be damned for being

in impossible spots is what you are here for--

oh pitiless God this is why you set us here--

oh merciless God this is how you save us

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

"When the doomed are most eloquent in their sinking,
It seems that then we are least strong to save..." --Malcolm Lowry

you know you didn't have to go that way
but since by your own testimony you "didn't give a fuck"
how else would you have gotten there?

whatever weakness of spirit could not preserve your body
was channelled and made strong applied to your supernal gift
and what you left was a music that would touch kindred souls
as long as your sound lasts in the world

this is the artist's immortality
as all artists leave work that will survive them
one way or another
to leave their mark but also to touch those here and to come

you left the party too soon
but may years or ages hence return in a new identity
and hear yourself as others will and say
"there's somethin' about this woman touches me"

but then what does it matter? you did your all here and now
and it will endure beyond yourself too wise to last
where all look for the validity a like soul could give with their gift
no you didn't have to go that way but then

how else would you have gotten there?

Contenbt (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

I cannot maintain

integrity any longer

or the loss

of value seeping

out of every

move every action

that keeps me

moving to what

dubious salvation of

nervous prayer and

plain shit talking

I know some

of us will

proceed in mute

determination always ready

to tear the

the best suggestion

in two but

then no easy

answer assures us

the loss of

integrity is a

salvation in itself

the ravaging blessing

the steady curse


and releasing

the played spirit

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
over and over you will return

over and over until you learn

the way to turn pride to humility

and turn your 'me' into 'we'

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
life goes on as it always has and will--

stop worshiping your fake beliefs

and actually be there for the ones

you love

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
the life you have is the one you deserve

now try not to botch it before your notice is served

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.
I gave up on hope

and hope did come

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Again, yet again I come. And where I go is no matter; all is the same ruining, all the same fleeting joys against the long established process of grief.

I am alone, and not alone, each of us his own, we are all in this together. How trite, you say. How true, I say. And they'd be no need to talk if we weren't so busy being clever, and tried more to be plain honest.

To whatever hell you conjure up for it! We are our own problem, and a burden to others. And each of us come and go again, yet again.

[Note: The above post relates to a series of postings made from June to July 2010 on a long poem I wrote long ago entitled Wails Of The Wraecca. "Wraecca" is an Anglo-Saxon word for an outcast, an exile, a wanderer. The poem's personae came to this state of existence by being rejected by his community for some crime against his liege lord, his protector. More often than not, this crime was disloyalty to his lord. Thus, no longer part of his clan, he was sent far from his kin. He would face the brutal privations of the wilderness alone. It is thus, that in the earth, we are all "wraeccas."]

Content (c) 2008-2011 Philip Milito.