Monday, November 30, 2009

I give you courage--

or try--taking my own strength for granted

when I'm not feeling it's spent--

but because it is not for me

that strength IS renewed and

I give you courage--or try--




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
one year at this blog--

everything's changed but nothing's new--

so I say something or not--

and the blog will end when God only knows when I'm through



Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

as if a thing like love mattered
cynic and optimist would agree

each would see what they'd want to see
and by their own vanity be flattered




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
last of the old
nothing I forgot

just getting used to a change
of medium and a shift

in self-identity

I am no longer who I was
but these baby steps will send
my aged skull to the sidewalk
if this keeps up ending the line

layer after layer
line upon line
I work toward finding
what my purpose is now

and what I do to manifest it

at least the poet is finally dead
(ignore the form in which I am writing this
it is mere force of habit)
a ghost of his sad pomp lingers in the fingers
itches under the skin
scratching the belly of a twice-poisoned dog
as I forget once and for all
the clownish mental pratfalls
of imitating Artaud
having his art and eating it too
oh at least that is finally dead

now I will sit easily in my own chair
histrionics exhausted
the matter at hand very at hand

how strange to have no self-image now
after years playing an ever lengthening movie in my head
the biography uttered by the narrator

another sound left in its own hearing
as I'm loosed from this theater

I yet a boy straggling after the saturday matinee
in the bright spring sunshine

wondering what can I do next








Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.


Monday, November 23, 2009

a fire--

a low distant flicker
in a far-off alleyway

and whatever
is happening there...







*


After December 1st, 2009--new content--new approach for this blog--

or not--

I may a ton of things to say--and share more adequately--

or I will find myself done and all these writings will be left

to be found or not--

read or not--

ignored or not--

of use to one stumbling on their way

and also stuck in realms such as these--

or unknown to all but souls

and spirit essences at this level

of development-

I am engaged

whether anyone engages with me

and somewhere somehow

this energy is out there--

for those with ears, etc. etc.--

the coming world

I do not like--

my time is up

my time is past

but I am here to make

of an end what I will

and all those

remains will

do is

nourish

some

other's

new

cycle

and

so

it

is

as

it

is

and

see

you

one

way

or

another--






Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
Parousia?---

WHEN???




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
what hard lessons
we endure

will do little but make
our dooms assured




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
what agony the world may know
will direct you where you need to go






Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
torn and scattered

like leaves

like hearts

each piece separate

on the ground

united in the dust




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
I had no way of knowing
I had no way of knowing






Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
jabs

the false sting

the overwrought complaint

the isolation of vanity





Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
I must be aging--
the hurts are absorbed
into a vagueness
of weary wisdom

or so I think--
aging as I am who I think
I am or was was all
excuse for acquiescence



Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.



what can be other
than what it is?

including ineluctable modality
and your interpretation?

and how often deny it
defy it and die slowly of it?

and how often rely on such excuse
as pardons the blind for their blindness?



Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

I am amazed at the world--

we might as well be back

one or two or ten thousand years

but the yammering hatreds and pettinesses--

the utility of brute stupidity

and the cunning of principled deceit--

are the same the same ever the same--

that is what it is to be in flesh--

this is what it is to be in the earth




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
I feel the air swirl around me again

again I am stationary turning direct

nothing to go back to so forward I go

nothing to go back to so forward I go







Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
lawdy what do I do now?

I sold my pig and I sold my cow--

on three beans a day I gorge and how

oh lawdy what do I do now?





Content (c) 2008-209 Philip Milito.
just thought I'd outwit the sheriff

by squeezing through thishere hole in the fence

but damned if the hen didn't give me away

with its clucking--

should've broken the fucker's neck--

sheriff or chicken I cain't decide--

sheet!--back to the shed--the bare trees--

the carpet of leaves in my front yard--

the low dull sun--and fifty-seven children in the crawlspace--

mad that there's no mo' clean well water--

damn socialist wants me t' drink the same

water everybody else does--

hmmm--how'd my ol' hound taste after a few hours

on the spit?




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

the world beneath the world I inhabit
is bubbling up like a geyser

I think I shall sit on the rim
and see where I am blown this time




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

conservatives are ipso facto idiots

this is why God invented them--

so they may be the death of us all--

thank ya Jesus--thank ya Lawd





Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
why am I pushing
why am I pushed
why am I asking
why am I asked

why I am asking why
am I being pushed to push

this is not as simple
as your mockery makes it

because I am pushed into
asking why am I asked to be pushed

(gertrude stein
trudest gerein
steinger trude
steintrude ger)

kenneth burke
and jonathan williams
will also do
too

why I asked them
why they asked
so I shut my mouth and
they got it




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

the bittersweet twilight

gray as a stone slab

is comfort to the winds capering 'round

the hard edge of stasis--

the fingers of air caress the rock heart--

the final fixity of this mode of being

lies in the joyful stillness of subsumed memory

and experience into the last view of ribbed red sundown--

the dense night falls over the last echoes of scattered leaves--

peace in the bare branches tangling upward the soft sky--




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Monday, November 9, 2009

I may not be able

to hoist you up

the ladder myself--

but I can be at the top--

ready with as strong a hand

as God has allowed me to form--

to help you as you left yourself

up off the top rung






Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
here I must go another way--

my time at this is empty

with all said and done--

here I must try as I may

the fresh doing that will free me

to undertake what has begun--

the finish of my closure

that by justice is my exposure--

so I am revealed in my leaving--

notions abandoned to awe beyond believing--




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
the world changes around us

from instant to instant---

every move we take a fresh start

every move we make culminate





Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
caught in my own compulsive nets again--

chewing my way through the strands yet again--

I know of no other way to live






Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
hear all the things I'd forgotten to say
echo under the skin of my face
like violent waves of a gray sea
washing away the shore of my peace




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
the permanent view of the Eternal Instant

belongs to everyone--

and each of us will finally know it

when each of us forgets himself utterly--

clear sight transcending imagined identities

and humility opening up awareness

of who each of us really is--

in the clear sight--in the permanent view



Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.


every time I open my eyes
I see I'm still in the earth--

will I know the release of death
when it comes or will I be

one of these fools who wake up
to super-vivid forms and wondering why

the door knob won't turn when I grab it?
how long 'til I stick my head through the door

and gasp at the unbelievable morning with my first
phrase a bewildered 'what--the--fuck?'

ah... to what we all have to look forward---




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
I've fallen a great distance off my footstool








Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

a last look at all I thought

was the end of lessons and suffering

the lessons continue

the suffering continues

I have nothing to add

and nothing to take away

I have no grudge after all

the raging hurts of those

who got over

now they will have to be God's business

we are denied vengeance--best of all--

because we lack the One's totality--

we're not there yet

but it's in us and seeps out

when most we need to recall

the breakage that will heal--the healing that will finish--


Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
here is the last of the mourning--

the loss is so long ago
it is no longer
remembered by the earth--

I carry it in mind
and even how it colored
my days has faded

even my thought cannot hold it
completely anymore--
even the wailing has subsided

and only the wind given sound
by the skin of my ears
is empty of association--here at

the last of any mourning




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
all
I
have
I
have
because
I
wanted
it--

I
will
never
know
in
this
skin
what
it
was
you
thought
I
wanted
from
you
but
you
did
not
care
that
you
were
wrong--

so
easy
to
be
friendly
when
you
don't
have
to
back
it
up

but
then
who
but
a
little
fool
would
be
interested
in
anyone
but
a
little
fool

I
am
sure
you
will
both
be
very
happy
until
you
are
not

and
I
am
happy
too--
you
two
deserve
each
other
and
I
deserve
to
be
spared--

nice
how
it
all
works
out
when
you
let
it--


Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

you lack my courage
and I lack your sense





Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
here is all I need to tell you--

( )
hear me?







Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
why am I still in remorseful mode?

is it from being slammed in the earth too long
and knowing any hope is truly nothing?

why am I still in expectant mood?




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
I sent out my joy
super-powered--

as if I'd discovered
all my loves

preserved perfectly--

and only found
myself--thinking very

very hard...




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

where we step now

watch for the quicksand of savage conformity--

this appears to be the Age for it--

the Aquarian Principles bad disgust

for another murderous regime of polite condescension

oppression and vengeance--

all the old power laying doggo--patient as the lion

waiting for the monkey to fall out of the tree--



Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
my Tourette prayers--

hoping the One hears past the words...



Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
waste

waste

one must be broken as a root




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
on the cobbled street (yes one remains unscarred
by asphalt)

echoes of lion roar and swift wings overhead--

or so he received it
years before the motorcycle launched him

to the other side--

where he knew then first-hand
the veracity of his visions--

of which we have in his art the traces--

which he left us going into that region
and sounding in divine frequency

echoes of lion roar and swift wings overhead--


(for Richard Farina)



Contents (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.


quiet imperfections delight our days--

the little nicks in the appetite
that are soothed by an inclusive gaze
into the middle ground over
a cup of coffee--

sorry to be of this world
but not sorry to be in it--these thoughtless

attachments gifts for the fallen--




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
the defeat of our time is not greatly mourned--

we're tired of it
and though we have no great love for the hells

to come--our defeat is as welcome as relief--



Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

garbage from the mouths of saints--

hard truths from the sinners

their only contrition regret they didn't get over--

garbage in the hosannas

garbage in god's love

garbage in the useless suffering--

it's all shit say the wearied saints

their only sorrow regret they were so holy about it--




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.




right action is the wrong mode
for the world--

here you will suffer unmercifully
for a god who'll weep for you

while scumbags and assholes
destroy everything they touch

and all you can do is die of hatred--
made ugly by the god's so-called love




Contents (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
I'm no longer a poet--

haven't been for years

now what do I do

that I should have done already--

engage imbeciles in the name of the Lord--

lower my head repeatedly for my own error--

get battered by God to put me in my right purpose--

get hung out in dry for not knowing my right purpose--

why this endless shit--

I look at the world and realize reincarnating

life and life isn't such a deal--

masses of morons measureless choking the earth--

what's their punishment for wasting life after life

and obviously not having learned anything--

I'm no longer a poet

haven't been for years

because I'm an idiot too for not learning--

until now that is...



Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
...the ringlets of sun through the curtain...






Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.
I will attend your need

by giving you hope--
even if I'm in short supply myself---





Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

Monday, November 2, 2009

I'm called to account--
I endure the result--
suffer the consequence
and hope--and hope--and hope--

this God of Love
is a God of Mercy--
I've already atoned
of God's vengeance

and hope--and hope--and hope--
this failing of my time
I'll account for and endure and suffer--
the result--the consequence--the hope--


Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.

a different world now subsists in the earth--

and it is through this overlay of consciousness--
this aggregate of minds
born of and displacing our tribe
of aging pseudo-mystics--

that all entitlement and advantage for this time's souls

prepare for their own fading--coming so soon
this full bloom will be but an instant in memory




Content (c) 2008-2009 Philip Milito.